Pashtun Marriage problem (need advice)

[Loy Afghanistan]

She is not dark-brown. Like she is light skinned, but she looks like a Pakistani and not Afghani. It's been a rough few days discussing the marriage topic with her. I have also cried many times because she tells me her parents are very strict and she doesn't know how to approach her parents. However, she has told me that she will try to talk to one of her aunts who is open minded in few weeks or in the summer when she is free about the situation. Then she will try to get her aunt to convince her mom. Like my Gf has told me her mom is not strict but the main worry is the dad. If my Gf can get her mom on her side then the mom can meet me. Once the mom meets me then she can vouch for me when my Gf fights for me.

To anyone who is talking about her parents killing her. It won't happen, we live in Canada, the law is really strict here. If they did anything to her, their whole family would be affected as the father or anyone involved would get a life sentence, and the father is the only one who brings in the money in their house. So I doubt he would sacrifice his whole family to kill a daughter who didn't listen to him.

Lastly, my gf has made it clear that her dad loves her more than anything, he loves her the most in the family because she is their only daughter. My gf told me, she hopes that her dad loves her enough to let her marry the guy of her choice. This is the little hope I hang on to.

Thank you to anyone who is supporting me, I don't see us as Pathans, Sindhi, Balochi or Punjabi. I see all of us as Muslims. I have the right to love a Muslim girl.

ahahahahahah. You don't know Pashtun parents. I am a boy, my parents was the same, they were so nice, best son, good grades in school. Told me just get a good education and you will have free will to do anything, marry anyone, choice your own path.

When I was nearly finished with my education and talked about marriage, they laughed at me threatening me if I choice anyone outside race, it will be consequences. I was chocked, this was totally new side I saw from my parents, specially my dad. First we had a lot of fights, I rebelled, moved out from the house. Then I researched about Pashtun history, Pashtun books, Pashtunwali, going Ph.D deep in Islam history, going back to Ariana times, then further ancient Avesta, Sanskrit, took me like 2 years, still outside work I research about my family line or Pashtuns when I have the time. I was so blind, so much history hiding and stolen from Pashtuns, and now I see clearly about my race and specially Pashtunwali. I told my dad he was right, and sacrificed love for something bigger, for Pashtun culture and untouched family line that dates back 1200 years with Y-chromosome evidence. So people may now understand why I am so hyped sometimes.
But still I have problem with my brother, he is younger, and getting his Ph.D 2016, but that looser is hanging around with paki, arab and Iranians girls in University. It is me who pay for his education, and I told him, don't mess around with those girls, they are problem. I can't complain so much, he is doing very good. But, when I saw a half black-nugger flirting with him, I was disappointed.

But still I don't understand if you are getting your education in foreign country, why would you bang some pakis, arabs or poor cousin Iranians, when they have better exotic meat like Europeans, Russians, Chinese, Koreans, Japanese. Well in foreign universities, many things happens, and in the end we are men/young boys, we tend to have more fun than usually. Those who have been there knows what I talk about.

Please stop calling us pathan. We don't call you hindu or canadian? etc.

Trust me, sometimes you get it all wrong. Pashtuns mothers tends to be nice to its boys. But when it comes to the girls, they are 2000 times worse than dads. At least the experience I fellt. 8/10 Pashtuns mothers are very hard at their daughters. And Dads are the other way, nice with their girls, and hard with their boys.

[afghan]

Sir, you are blind to the world.

By saying that Pashtuns should not marry outside of their race, you are saying that you are not a believer of Islam.

It's easy to say you are the best, but It takes a stronger person to be humble.


Even regarding Hindus, it's not about the dark skin or cultural differences, but only about the faith.

Look at this Afghan woman that married an Indian.

Betrayed Afghan girl's fight: India's Army Chief reacts - YouTube


He lied about his conversion to Islam and used this poor woman for time pass.


You are like the person that only wants roses in his garden, and cannot accept any other flower.

Please try to be more open minded.

Is every Pashtun a nice guy? You already know the answer.

What If this guy that started the thread is very religious and a kind person?


Yaar, I know where you are coming from, but the times have changed.

I am an Arain Punjabi, and my parents made it clear that I can never marry anyone else other than Arain girl. Rajputs are seen as higher status than us, but my family will not accept it. They are not impressed by Pashtun, Sindhi, Turkish, Baluch girls, or any anyone else.

I am going to marry who I will, because of my parent's request, but there is nothing wrong with any of the girls that I mentioned.

This is jahalat on the part of my parents, but still I must honor their desire.

there is no doubts that Arain are good people and your girls might not marry outsiders. have you heard that girl speaking hindi? how pure hindi she spoke with an indian accent. no matter how educated pashtuns are their hindi isn't that great. then she was borned and raised in pakistan. she might a child of pashtun refuge in panjab and didn't know she existed.

[HalloIsBack]

She is not dark-brown. Like she is light skinned, but she looks like a Pakistani and not Afghani. It's been a rough few days discussing the marriage topic with her. I have also cried many times because she tells me her parents are very strict and she doesn't know how to approach her parents. However, she has told me that she will try to talk to one of her aunts who is open minded in few weeks or in the summer when she is free about the situation. Then she will try to get her aunt to convince her mom. Like my Gf has told me her mom is not strict but the main worry is the dad. If my Gf can get her mom on her side then the mom can meet me. Once the mom meets me then she can vouch for me when my Gf fights for me.

To anyone who is talking about her parents killing her. It won't happen, we live in Canada, the law is really strict here. If they did anything to her, their whole family would be affected as the father or anyone involved would get a life sentence, and the father is the only one who brings in the money in their house. So I doubt he would sacrifice his whole family to kill a daughter who didn't listen to him.

Lastly, my gf has made it clear that her dad loves her more than anything, he loves her the most in the family because she is their only daughter. My gf told me, she hopes that her dad loves her enough to let her marry the guy of her choice. This is the little hope I hang on to.

Thank you to anyone who is supporting me, I don't see us as Pathans, Sindhi, Balochi or Punjabi. I see all of us as Muslims. I have the right to love a Muslim girl.

i'm so happy to hear about that you both fiught as much as you can.

wish you all the best!

especially the last two sentences

[KGODB]

pakwatan sahib,
The word pathan,afghan,sulaimani are words used by outsiders for pashtuns.
We never use this term in our daily life.
We use pukhtoon or pashtun not pathan.
pathan is the indainised name of pashtun.
afghan is iranizad name of pashtun
sulaimani arabized and turkified.

although technically correct, the attempt to put Afghan in the same category is bullshyt

Afghan as a name has a significant historical tradition, that name is thousand of years old. Plus, its a name we have eagerly accepted, unlike Pathan, or Sulamaini (Ive never heard of that in my life)

[gadoonwal]

the pashtuns in 1747 were idiots. they didn't know that they you were going to object to its name. pashtun are reffered by various names patan is one of the most commonly used. then why not patanistan. yeh khushal baba was mughal offspring thats why he used afghan. and then ahmad shah baba was another offspring of mughal to support the name afghanistan.

The problem is that when afghan have no answer they start ,,yaw ghar aw bal ghar,,,,,,
The most common name used by us pashtun or pakhtun not afghan nor pathan.So our land should be known as pashtunkhwa in pashtu or parsi name pashtunistan.
If you been to pashtunkhwa honestly tell us how many people use the term afghan or pathan?
How many people in kandar,paktya use the term afghan in daily life?
You people are fully brainwashed more then those pakipied pashtuns.
The reason some call us sulaimani cus many us originated from the sulaim mountain.
I hate this superioty complex.I want every pashtun to know the reality.

I challenge any history man here to prove ahmad shah baba name your country afghanistan?
why he use the name pashtunkhwa then in his poetry?
why the afghan lover khushal baba use this name pashtunkhwa?
why pashtun poet malak yar gharsheen use this name centuries ago?
why great alama habibi reject the THEORY OF AFGHAN?
WHY pashtun historain shah zafar fully explained in his book that afghan is fake name and not real?
It is mugali and iranizad name of pashtuns.
why greek historain
herodotus use the name pakhteen or pashteen (in his accent) for us thousands years ago?
i think he was paki too,right?
ibni batota in his book called afghan persain speaking.
When he reached near kabul area people were speaking persain and call themselves afghan so i am sure he was paki,right?
whoever support pashtun is paki in your view.

So all of them are wrong but persains are correct cus we pashtuns been slave to them.
Every pashtun historain is wrong but mugalis are correct about the word afghan.
Because we pashtun been slaves of their language.A mugal was the governer of kabul and sarounding as far as herat.
Long live great emal khan momand,darya khan khushal khan of pakhtunkhwa .These are the people save the honour of pashtuns.
we pashtun admire their(persain) rivers and their sherany and farhad in our poetry cus we been slave to them for centuries.
Thanks to khushal baba to change that poetry to landi seen in pashtu.
Thanks to mirwais hotak for kicking out persains from kandar.
You people read the history of pashtuns written by persains.
kindly go and read some books in pashtu.
You afghanis are kept in dark by persains more then pakis kept us.
kindly be proud of pashtun and do,nt follow outsiders and those influence by outsiders.
No offence to anyone.
If great abdali baba was alive today he would call his beloved country pashtunkhwa not some persain afghanistan.
Remember the modren afghanistan was founded by ameer abdurahman
.All the boundreies as far as herat drawn by britishes after the durandline treaty.You can confirm this from the same persain historain you follow.
All of the above the question is still the same if afghanistan mean pashtunistan then whats the problem with renamining it with pashtunistan or pashtunkhwa?

The world has gone too far but we pashtuns are still not sure what our real name is.
may allah help pashtuns of pashtunistan and afghanistan.
Only allah can help.
We are failed on all side no matter anyside.
pashtun can say anything but the reality is that they are the most backward AND disadvantage people on earth.
They will be slaves of persain language and people.
They will be slaves of punjabis.
This is fact.
The superiority bs is,nt working.We are exposed by all means.


I am not against any name but all i want pashtun should use their real name pashtun.
I do,nt get offend if someone call me afghan.I am afghan cus other called me this name but in reality it is not my name.
There is nothing wrong with word afghan but this not real thats all.

[Loy Afghanistan]

The problem is that when afghan have no answer they start ,,yaw ghar aw bal ghar,,,,,,
The most common name used by us pashtun or pakhtun not afghan nor pathan.So our land should be known as pashtunkhwa in pashtu or parsi name pashtunistan.
If you been to pashtunkhwa honestly tell us how many people use the term afghan or pathan?
How many people in kandar,paktya use the term afghan in daily life?
You people are fully brainwashed more then those pakipied pashtuns.
The reason some call us sulaimani cus many us originated from the sulaim mountain.
I hate this superioty complex.I want every pashtun to know the reality.

I challenge any history man here to prove ahmad shah baba name your country afghanistan?
why he use the name pashtunkhwa then in his poetry?
why the afghan lover khushal baba use this name pashtunkhwa?
why pashtun poet malak yar gharsheen use this name centuries ago?
why great alama habibi reject the THEORY OF AFGHAN?
WHY pashtun historain shah zafar fully explained in his book that afghan is fake name and not real?
It is mugali and iranizad name of pashtuns.
why greek historain
herodotus use the name pakhteen or pashteen (in his accent) for us thousands years ago?
i think he was paki too,right?
ibni batota in his book called afghan persain speaking.
When he reached near kabul area people were speaking persain and call themselves afghan so i am sure he was paki,right?
whoever support pashtun is paki in your view.

So all of them are wrong but persains are correct cus we pashtuns been slave to them.
Every pashtun historain is wrong but mugalis are correct about the word afghan.
Because we pashtun been slaves of their language.A mugal was the governer of kabul and sarounding as far as herat.
Long live great emal khan momand,darya khan khushal khan of pakhtunkhwa .These are the people save the honour of pashtuns.
we pashtun admire their(persain) rivers and their sherany and farhad in our poetry cus we been slave to them for centuries.
Thanks to khushal baba to change that poetry to landi seen in pashtu.
Thanks to mirwais hotak for kicking out persains from kandar.
You people read the history of pashtuns written by persains.
kindly go and read some books in pashtu.
You afghanis are kept in dark by persains more then pakis kept us.
kindly be proud of pashtun and do,nt follow outsiders and those influence by outsiders.
No offence to anyone.
If great abdali baba was alive today he would call his beloved country pashtunkhwa not some persain afghanistan.
Remember the modren afghanistan was founded by ameer abdurahman
.All the boundreies as far as herat drawn by britishes after the durandline treaty.You can confirm this from the same persain historain you follow.
All of the above the question is still the same if afghanistan mean pashtunistan then whats the problem with renamining it with pashtunistan or pashtunkhwa?

The world has gone too far but we pashtuns are still not sure what our real name is.
may allah help pashtuns of pashtunistan and afghanistan.
Only allah can help.
We are failed on all side no matter anyside.
pashtun can say anything but the reality is that they are the most backward AND disadvantage people on earth.
They will be slaves of persain language and people.
They will be slaves of punjabis.
This is fact.
The superiority bs is,nt working.We are exposed by all means.


I am not against any name but all i want pashtun should use their real name pashtun.
I do,nt get offend if someone call me afghan.I am afghan cus other called me this name but in reality it is not my name.
There is nothing wrong with word afghan but this not real thats all.

True wroora. I agree completely, we should start promoting more Pashtun language. The thing about Pashtuns have been best warriors in all major empire armies. From ancient Achaemenids to Ottomans.

The only way you think Pashtuns has been slaves because propaganda history written by "Persians" or others. In fact, Pashtuns has always fight against outsiders never been submitted. But in history they don't write that, because it gives people more power and pride.

I don't understand why we argue about small Shhiitts? Sometimes you protect panj baboons, some times you curse at them? I get confused.

[gadoonwal]

True wroora. I agree completely, we should start promoting more Pashtun language. The thing about Pashtuns have been best warriors in all major empire armies. From ancient Achaemenids to Ottomans.

The only way you think Pashtuns has been slaves because propaganda history written by "Persians" or others. In fact, Pashtuns has always fight against outsiders never been submitted. But in history they don't write that, because it gives people more power and pride.

I don't understand why we argue about small Shhiitts? Sometimes you protect panj baboons, some times you curse at them? I get confused.

saiba,
i never and never will protect panjoos.
i am realistic and want to show the real picture to pashtuns.
If i admire punajos sometime that dose ,nt mean i like doing this.
I do it for the good of pashtuns.
I want pashtuns to pls get out of this superiority complex and see where we stand today.

I want pashtun not to blame others always.
How would someone get into my house if it is fully protected?
why we are fighting others,s war?
what make me up set and sad that our brothers died,our sisters begging in the streets and others enjoy up on our victories.
We will suffer always why?
why we kill our great leaders?

Why pashtuns are living in pourty in their janat watan?
Others can send their children to school and pashtuns children will be used like sucide bombers.
why they want us to arabaised?
why everyone hate my language and culture.
why we look down up on holy pashtu?
Come and see the situation of afghan-pashtun children in pakistan who should we blame for this?
no school and no education.Uncertain future why?
Many pashtunkhwa children suffer the same way why?
The whole world is watching and we selfish pashtuns only care for our own families.
where is pashtun gerat and nang?
where is the voice of pashtun?
why we have become tools and toys for tajiks,punjabis,west and so on ?

I did and will support pashtun unity from the mountains of batagram to farah and herat.From laghman to bolan etc.
How ?
i am searching for the answer.
I have seen many of these pashtun leaders on both side of durand but could,nt get clear answer.
Remember our suffering will continue untill we find our way to the unity and one great country of pashtuns.
If we accept this reality that we are no longer great nation then i am sure we will move farword.
A hindu indain is super power and helping us and we calling them names is that make sense?
A lahori ruled us and control our politics and policies in afghanistan and still we are great.
wrora i am tired of explaining this to pashtuns from very young age of 15 years.
I helped tajiks even in pashtunkhwa cus i treat them like my country men but then when i swa this hatered towards pashtu and pashtuns that change my view on them.
Still i do not hate them but will never accept their superiority complex.

[gadoonwal]

True wroora. I agree completely, we should start promoting more Pashtun language. The thing about Pashtuns have been best warriors in all major empire armies. From ancient Achaemenids to Ottomans.

The only way you think Pashtuns has been slaves because propaganda history written by "Persians" or others. In fact, Pashtuns has always fight against outsiders never been submitted. But in history they don't write that, because it gives people more power and pride.

I don't understand why we argue about small Shhiitts? Sometimes you protect panj baboons, some times you curse at them? I get confused.

I have written a diary in pashtu language for my future generation never to accept pakistan and durandline.
i fully explained this in my dairy.

May be somone in the future do something good.
No one can mix or use a singel word of urdu or english in pashtu in my family .I taught them if i even find you then first go for tooth brush then you will be punished.
I do this like tableeg everywhere in pashtunkhwa.

[Loy Afghanistan]

I have written a diary in pashtu language for my future generation never to accept pakistan and durandline.
i fully explained this in my dairy.

May be somone in the future do something good.
No one can mix or use a singel word of urdu or english in pashtu in my family .I taught them if i even find you then first go for tooth brush then you will be punished.
I do this like tableeg everywhere in pashtunkhwa.

Mashallah grana. It sounds very good, and the same ideology I have.

[Niceguy91]

While all of you guys argue about your heritage, let me tell you something. At the end of the day when we die we go into a 6 feet grave in a white sheet. Allah will not care what language we spoke, what our heritage was. He will see if we were good humans and whether we followed the ways of Islam. I bet Muhammad (SAW) - peace be upon him, is looking down on all the Muslims and frowning upon us, because we have no unity.

Just remember Once the game is over, the King and the pawns go back in the same box.

[Diaphanous]

traditional afghans are on this thread. Why does it matter what language you speak or what country you are from? We are all muslims. And thats what should matter to us. Cause that is all that is going to matter to Allah, and our deeds. Why don't you go and do something useful, like try to make a friend from another culture and try to bring unity among muslims, instead of separating yourselves from them. This is why Islam can't go anywhere, because of narrow-minded people like all of you that think your culture is better than someone else's culture. Remember, government and people are different. Don't hate people because of what their government is doing. Don't hate the government because of what the people are doing.

You think that pakistanis are so bad, there are afghans just as bad in our country. And in every other culture and ethnicity. Every country, every ethnicity, every tribe has good and bad people. Don't judge people on what a few do. We, as muslims, should know this better than anyone. Especially with what some extremist groups have done.

[کیش]

i'm non muslim and non pashtun

Than for the nth time, the flock do you want from us. Jesus Christ the son of the virgin Mary, can you explain your reasoning's for stalking us. its not like Pashtuns are good people. we aren't good looking, nor rich.

[IvNoName]

we aren't good looking, nor rich.

That is the whole point.

Plus, people who wonder why people do what they do or think what they think end up creating fake boyfriends in the forums in order to boost heir e-ego.

[Loy Afghanistan]

Why are you mostly western minded people puting GIF pictures of famous monkeys, thugs, drug addicts and so on here on PF? What is the your problem? Can't you express yourself with words? Is it hard to express yourself? Go back to school.

Thing is I think this dude got killed or something, I told him, go find panjabian instead, forget our Pashtun sister, I bet her family wants Pashtun children, not panjabian.
I am for business, education, science cooperation with the world. But foreigners should stay out from our domestic culture/traditions. The same we don't ask and tell them change their own ways. Mind your own business.

[afghan]

Why are you mostly western minded people puting GIF pictures of famous monkeys, thugs, drug addicts and so on here on PF? What is the your problem? Can't you express yourself with words? Is it hard to express yourself? Go back to school.

Thing is I think this dude got killed or something, I told him, go find panjabian instead, forget our Pashtun sister, I bet her family wants Pashtun children, not panjabian.
I am for business, education, science cooperation with the world. But foreigners should stay out from our domestic culture/traditions. The same we don't ask and tell them change their own ways. Mind your own business.

Killzai entropy has no shame. He cannt leave this forum.