have you had a boyfriend or girlfriend?

[*Mahzala*]

Liars, Liars, Liars !

You are not telling the truth, because this topic is taboo and it is very cool to say that you are single. By saying that you are single. You are trying to attrack your opposite sex in someway.
Girls who say that they don't have boyfriends are mabye because they are ugly and sitting allday behind pc. They have nothing to do in life. They will remain solo for the rest of their life. Or they will import poor boys from their homeland.I am not talking about all girls. But there are some.

Everyone can fall in love with someone. Because they are human beings.
Boys who claim not to have girlfriend maybe they are attending regularly brothels or porn website.
I believe a relationship has nothing to doing with religion and culture as far as your respect the limits. I have pashtun friends in peshawar, who have girlfriends and boyfriends. They meet each others in universities and schools and exchange numbers. And their family doesn't know anything about it.
I had 3 girlfriends in life. I was in love with them. But unfortunately I was too young at that time.

And recently I am happyly engaged.

I don't think it is taboo in anyway. In fact, I think it is a dominant part of many cultures. I don't think it is limited by appearance of either gender and attraction does not only arise from the physical. Loving someone and taking those emotions further on immoral grounds are two different things. I also like to think that what you are referring to is lust which is an outfit you change several times before you find the right one, which is love. Having friends who engage in such acts neither justifies the act nor makes it acceptable nor moral. Having been engaged in relationships before marriage has few gains and many long terms losses and dangers, the most important being insecurity. Many like to think they will gain some 'experience' of some sort but it is quite the opposite, as every individual is different, and every encounter is a new experience. People of such nature never have stable lives as they make habit of giving themselves change in their lives. They then reach a stage where they feel commitment will solve their desires, but that too, is only short term. They end up in the 'comparison struggle' and find they are never satisfied with their existing situation. If anything, I consider it (the habit of having relationships before marriage) one's weakness on many levels. And on the back of all of this, funny you consider it unfortunate.

[Feroza_Banu]

this topic is funny... as if someone will come here and say "ya i have a boyfriend..." or "ya i have a girlfriend..."

parents living under the same roof with their children don't even know whether their kids have boyfriends and girlfriends or not...

[Shaed]

Liars, Liars, Liars !

You are not telling the truth, because this topic is taboo and it is very cool to say that you are single. By saying that you are single. You are trying to attrack your opposite sex in someway.
Girls who say that they don't have boyfriends are mabye because they are ugly and sitting allday behind pc. They have nothing to do in life. They will remain solo for the rest of their life. Or they will import poor boys from their homeland.I am not talking about all girls. But there are some.

Everyone can fall in love with someone. Because they are human beings.
Boys who claim not to have girlfriend maybe they are attending regularly brothels or porn website.
I believe a relationship has nothing to doing with religion and culture as far as your respect the limits. I have pashtun friends in peshawar, who have girlfriends and boyfriends. They meet each others in universities and schools and exchange numbers. And their family doesn't know anything about it.
I had 3 girlfriends in life. I was in love with them. But unfortunately I was too young at that time.

And recently I am happyly engaged.

well this has to be the most stupid post on here...just because a guy/girl write on here they have no boyfriend or girl friend you accuse them or protray them as being some sex beasts who vistis brothels and porn sites?..and those girls that have no boyfriends are ugly and will remain 'solo'. well thats a bleak look on life isnt it? get a grip mate not everythings is that black and white. dont you think when someone writes on here they have no boyfriend/gf they are being honest? i mean what exactly have they got to lose/gain from lying? nothing.

[Fahd]

no never had and i don't want
don't even think im gay im not
lol

my oldest kid is 4 years old and youngest was born last week.
got twins aswell...lol

mashallah why u didn't say that !!!!!!!!!!!
mubark sha

Liars, Liars, Liars !

You are not telling the truth, because this topic is taboo and it is very cool to say that you are single. By saying that you are single. You are trying to attrack your opposite sex in someway.
Girls who say that they don't have boyfriends are mabye because they are ugly and sitting allday behind pc. They have nothing to do in life. They will remain solo for the rest of their life. Or they will import poor boys from their homeland.I am not talking about all girls. But there are some.

Everyone can fall in love with someone. Because they are human beings.
Boys who claim not to have girlfriend maybe they are attending regularly brothels or porn website.
I believe a relationship has nothing to doing with religion and culture as far as your respect the limits. I have pashtun friends in peshawar, who have girlfriends and boyfriends. They meet each others in universities and schools and exchange numbers. And their family doesn't know anything about it.
I had 3 girlfriends in life. I was in love with them. But unfortunately I was too young at that time.

And recently I am happyly engaged.

just i will tell this line
ppl see each other by they nature
hahaha

[eccentric]

..... limited by appearance of either gender and attraction does not only arise from the physical.

I wouldn't say either gender. Men are mainly attracted to phsycal appearance.That is why women should wear Hijab in Islam.Though, I personally believe that it is not the only solution.

Loving someone and taking those emotions further on immoral grounds are two different things.

They both are emotions, man and woman pose them.

I also like to think that what you are referring to is lust which is an outfit you change several times before you find the right one, which is love. Having friends who engage in such acts neither justifies the act nor makes it acceptable nor moral. Having been engaged in relationships before marriage has few gains and many long terms losses and dangers, the most important being insecurity. Many like to think they will gain some 'experience' of some sort but it is quite the opposite, as every individual is different, and every encounter is a new experience. People of such nature never have stable lives as they make habit of giving themselves change in their lives. They then reach a stage where they feel commitment will solve their desires, but that too, is only short term. They end up in the 'comparison struggle' and find they are never satisfied with their existing situation. If anything, I consider it (the habit of having relationships before marriage) one's weakness on many levels.

my friends are only example of them. There are million of single men in afghanistan and pakistan.

And on the back of all of this, funny you consider it unfortunate.

It is unfortunate,because I couldn't marry any of them.Though, I was ready to marry them. By the after each of those relationship there was gaps of years.

this topic is funny... as if someone will come here and say "ya i have a boyfriend..." or "ya i have a girlfriend..."

parents living under the same roof with their children don't even know whether their kids have boyfriends and girlfriends or not...

I know your answer. Don't worry.
You can still send her your answer by private message we are provided.

well this has to be the most stupid post on here...just because a guy/girl write on here they have no boyfriend or girl friend you accuse them or protray them as being some sex beasts who vistis brothels and porn sites?..and those girls that have no boyfriends are ugly and will remain 'solo'. well thats a bleak look on life isnt it? get a grip mate not everythings is that black and white. dont you think when someone writes on here they have no boyfriend/gf they are being honest? i mean what exactly have they got to lose/gain from lying? nothing.

I think you are still, too young. Who has no experience of life.

no never had and i don't want
don't even think im gay im not
lol


just i will tell this line
ppl see each other by they nature
hahaha

hahah. You are nature is different, though.

[Fahd]

hahah. You are nature is different, though.

dame should i have girlfreind to become normal like u :P
lol
no i respect girls and all of girl's like ma sisters
the propht said if u hurt someone sis or girl
then any one will become and hurt your's like u did
and that's real
(btw guys who look for girlfriend alot of them looking for fun no real love or something like u think and if u asked him u will marry her i swear he will say noooooooo why i can't marry her she get out with me how can i trust her after marry mybe she get out like she did with me with out her family know )
and thats the end
i think am right

[Laila]

My brother had a girlfriend of nearly a year. But they broke up a few months ago. When my family found out about his relationship, my father simply told him 'I am disappointed in you.' My father was crushed. For three months, my father did not even look at my brother.

I just do not think its worth a parents disappointment.....i mean aside from our religion, culture....i cannot bear to hear my father or mother's disappointment. To me it is just not worth it. So no, i have never had a boyfriend. Its an honest answer and i plan to keep it that way.

[Master Khan]

aaoo kaana, Its brings shame on your parents because in our Culture this kind of act is not right, But girls having a boyfriend in our culture is even worse.

[Shaed]

I think you are still, too young. Who has no experience of life.

dont patronise me, age has nothing to do with this.

[Master Khan]

No you shouldn't call girls ugly, girls have alot of feelings and you shouldn't hurt them.

[Sheenka]

My brother had a girlfriend of nearly a year. But they broke up a few months ago. When my family found out about his relationship, my father simply told him 'I am disappointed in you.' My father was crushed. For three months, my father did not even look at my brother.

I just do not think its worth a parents disappointment.....i mean aside from our religion, culture....i cannot bear to hear my father or mother's disappointment. To me it is just not worth it. So no, i have never had a boyfriend. Its an honest answer and i plan to keep it that way.

i agree wid u liala coz girlfreind or boyfreind will never stay forever they will break up one day, which means it's not a love
and beside that its harm and wrong culturally which again good for us

aaoo kaana, Its brings shame on your parents because in our Culture this kind of act is not right, But girls having a boyfriend in our culture is even worse.

yah i agree
i would never let my bro to marry a girl who has bf or a guy who has gf

No you shouldn't call girls ugly, girls have alot of feelings and you shouldn't hurt them.

[Amir al Ghaznavi]

maaan, first of all it aint nobodies business who has a girl or boyfriend. frankly i dont think anyone here would be honest anyways. therefore, i find this thread useless

[Sher Malang]

I had some but broke up with the last one on Jan 2010. :D

[Sher Malang]

i would never let my bro to marry a girl who has bf or a guy who has gf

Is he a bisexual? :P

[eccentric]

dame should i have girlfreind to become normal like u :P
lol
no i respect girls and all of girl's like ma sisters
the propht said if u hurt someone sis or girl
then any one will become and hurt your's like u did

and thats the end
i think am right

When all girls are your sisters. Will you marry a man ?

never had a girlfriend and don't intend to, and neither do I want to marry someone who had boyfriends. This is going to be a pretty big post just to warn all of you.

Pretty disappointed to be reading these posts. Have I had the desire to have a girlfriend (any)? Yes, did I act on that desire? NO
And that would be for several reasons but most importantly to set a good example for my sisters. Also to set a good example to fellow Muslims and Pashtuns.

Would a Pashtun guy (who has had a girlfriend) marry a Pashtun girl (who has had a boyfriend)? BTW, when any of you state that you have had a "partner," I assume you have had pre-marital sex, and that is what anyone else with half a mind would assume.
If the choice came down to it, I would rather my sisters marry a solid Muslim non-Pashtun who had never had girlfriends rather than a Pashtun who did. Also, if it came down to it, I would marry out of Pashtuns, if all Pashtun girls I met that I had some interest in had boyfriends.

This stuff is not for us, and one should have utmost shame when talking about this. Although, this is good for discussion. It is these things that start the disintegraton of a culture. Think, in the future, your daughter comes home, and tells you she has a boyfriend, and they are going to the movies, and doesn't know what time she will be back. Think. Would you be a pimp, and say you are OK with it because modern times call for modernty(whatever that means?), or would you say NO and be a hypocrite.


now if one wants to talk about this, could I have had girlfriends? Well, not meant in a boastful way (since there is nothing to be proud of-this is what pimps do), but I have had random girls chase me. Always was friendly with them, never meant to give them the wrong impression. this one persian girl broke up with her bf after we spoke about school with each other. She started walking around with me, and I didn't know what to do. Her ex-bf was mad, and I was like thinking I don't want her anyways. Yeah, she was not bad looking, but I thought how dirty she was, and what is her mind to think someone like me (and she knew what type of person I was) would ever consider something like her HAHA. Someone like that becomes so ugly to me. i can't like them lol. So I just ignored her straight and simple. there was no other way. Did I feel bad? Yes. Was I right? Yes. This is our way.

Then there was this Jewish girl who would not give up. She was not bad looking either (I say it like that because it sounds cheap to say yeah she so fine). Well she had guts to just take my cell phone out of my hands and put her number in it after she asked me how my fast was, and told me she was observing Rosh Hashana. Well, another girl I had to disappoint. Did i want to date her? Yes. It was a temptation that Im going to say I had. I didn't know what to do with her number. All my pathetic white friends told me that I was mad, and that they would "hit" it. I was too focused on my studies and my culture. So for 3 weeks I did nothing until I saw her roaming around campus, and she completely ignored me, and looked upset. I called her that night, and left a message telling her I just wanted to find out how she was doing, and that she doesn't have to call me back esp since I had an exam. That was the end of that. She came t terms with the fact that that was the way I was, and didn't hold it against me. I told her actually that I don't do this stuff.

Eveything you do now will have a consequence in the future. Dating American girls will give you STDS which you will find out about in 10 years when symptoms of certain viruses begin to show up. Maybe you already have pimples around your mouth? And if you are dating a pashtana, all I can say is you pretty much destroyed her. Anyone who finds out will think what a pimp you are and what a ***** she is. Is it worth it?

that is all an assumption ^^. and they say assumptions are the mother of all f ups. And any girl here could turn around and say the exact same thing about you! that maybe you are ugly and you come on forums to increase your self esteem, and tell people how many girls you had!!! People come on these forums to discuss things. Unlike you people, most aren't all thinking about getting married, and thinking thats the whole meaning of life ( loss of ambition) (What is love? baby don't hurt me, don't hurt me )HAHA

I also know a ton of ugly guys who get married to decent looking girls. You want to know the reason. Its because they are so ugly, and the girls are so confident that they will never cheat on them. Don't think girls don't objectify guys just as much as guys do it to them. They have their resons too. Calling a girl ugly is a big NO NO for us. I have never done it in my life, and see the world in black and white, there is no grey.

Don't be Funny !
I am not one of those sissy guys when a girl is talking to them, his chicken legs start shaking.
I didn't say that girls are ugly in this forum. I said they might be. There is a spelling mistake. In farsi there is a proverb. Aaqilaan paye nuqta namerawad. So don't misquote me please.
I am not metrosexual. Therefore, it is not important for me to be handsome.

Please don't teach Islam to me. I am Muslim.I know alot about Islam than you think.(Both about Shia and Sunni) We believe that Allah(S.W.T) is all knowing and seeing. HE only can judge us. And I don't think if commited any sin by expressing my emotions to a girl.
Even Islam says, marry the womon of your choice.

When there are Pashtun Hindus, Shias, Sunnis who don't practice their religion. So the culture is nothing worthier than their religion to practise.


The rest what you said is only conjecture for today's society.