what would justify hitting a woman...

[Feroza_Banu]

Asalam o alaikum my dear brothers and sisters...

brothers:

what action of a woman justifies:

1. raising a hand on her
2. beating her up
3. killing her


please give explanation of your answer... it won't be sufficient answer if you write "nothing" or "yes, no"

Sisters:

What action of yours will justify your husband to

1. raise his hand on you
2. beat you
3. kill you

please give explanation of your answer... it won't be sufficient answer if you write "nothing" or "yes, no"

[єѕαρχαι]

probably if your wife is cheating on you.

I dont know maybe that could be the only case. that i get out of temper. but if i am in my senses i will divorce her simply

[Palwasha]

*Wa'alaykum asalaam.

Any man who even lays a finger on a woman is a coward. I don't think anything is justifiable, unless it's to stop her from physically doing harm to someone. There are means to stop a woman without having to lay her out.

If I had a husband who ever tried to do anything of the sort, God forbid, I'd leave him straight away.

[єѕαρχαι]

*Wa'alaykum asalaam.

Any man who even lays a finger on a woman is a coward. I don't think anything is justifiable, unless it's to stop her from physically doing harm to someone. There are means to stop a woman without having to lay her out.

If I had a husband who ever tried to do anything of the sort, God forbid, I'd leave him straight away.

what would you do if you get a husband who cheats on you .

and you caught him red handed :D

wont you get out of temper ?

[Palwasha]

what would you do if you get a husband who cheats on you .

and you caught him red handed :D

wont you get out of temper ?

God forbid!!
Lol, would I get out of temper..?

Either way, I wouldn't touch him, from that moment he'd be dead to me.

Besides why would I need to raise my hand to him when I have brothers?

[Master Khan]

If she cheats on me and god forbid that but I marry a another women instend.

[Feroza_Banu]

If she cheats on me and god forbid that but I marry a another women instend.

if she cheats on you it will jusify what? u didn't pick one of the options of the post.

[amna.]

No action justifies hitting someone. If a man ever raises his hands on me I will leave him.

we are humans we make mistakes. d

[parsiwaan]

Asalam o alaikum my dear brothers and sisters...

brothers:

what action of a woman justifies:

1. raising a hand on her
2. beating her up
3. killing her


please give explanation of your answer... it won't be sufficient answer if you write "nothing" or "yes, no"

Sisters:

What action of yours will justify your husband to

1. raise his hand on you
2. beat you
3. kill you

please give explanation of your answer... it won't be sufficient answer if you write "nothing" or "yes, no"

Zan ra ba Zaar bekhaar ba Tabaar Zan
Agaar Mord degaar zan agaar Namoord Degaar zan

if my food is not ready....
if my tea is not on time... i drink some green tea after lunch and dinner....
if my cloth is not wash..
if home is not clean
if she doesn't take care of her self...

My Kamarbaands comes so handy in all the mention situations.

[parsiwaan]

I will never hit a woman. Never. Anyone who does so needs help. If she heats I will divorce her and hate her but I will not kill her.

if she "heats" you need to call the Etfahaa or try to pure some water on her....not nice to divorce a heated woman...this male chauvinism need to stop.

[Roshina]

Just as nothing would ever justify hitting a man, nothing justifies hitting a woman either. A man who dares to lay a hand on his wife does not deserve to be around ANY human -- including his own wife and kids.

I must add, though, I know of women who say that they'd hit their husbands if such and such happened, and then you ask them, "If you did the same thing and he hit you for it, what would you do?" And they go, "Oh no! No way! I would NEVER let him hit me." And I'm like, "But you just said you'd hit him if he did such and such thing."
I don't support double standards.

So, I can't ever support hitting of an adult -- let alone KILLING!

Oh, wait, though. Has anyone watched the movie "Provoked"? It's a true story, according to the producers. It's about this Indian woman who had an arranged marriage (I'm not sure if it was forced or not), and she goes to England with her husband right after their wedding. Her husband turns out to be an abusive beast, and she bears him for ten years. So, one night, he almost presses a hot, burning iron on her face, and she decides that she's had enough. That night, she contemplates killing him for about two hours and finally figures out how to do it: Burning him while he's asleep.

I don't know if the beast died, but she gets sent to jail for it because, according to the court, "It wasn't really self-defense. You thought about it for a couple of hours before resorting to killing him. If you'd killed him instantly, right after he almost put the burning iron on your face, then that may have been acceptable. But this way, you deserve to be punished." Unfortunately for her, almost all the people involved in the court were males, and the only female there ... wasn't supportive (if I remember correctly). It was in jail that she learned to read and write and meet other women who had also killed their husbands to save their own lives. She was like, "You all don't feel guilty?" And some said yes, but others were like, "Please. Feel guilty for having killed a man who almost killed ME? Not at all!" Being an easterner, she didn't believe in revealing her private life to anyone, so no one knew. But she finally opened up to this one lady in her cell, and the lady happened to have a brother who was a lawyer, who ended up supporting her. She was also introduced to some Indian organizations opting for giving shelter and a voice to abused women, so she got lucky that way as well.

So, yeah, the only time I'd support killing someone is when you have to defend your own life. If you're not allowed to divorce the person (as is the case with some, not all, couples) and you hate your life and you fear for life day in and day out while your partner is enjoying it like crazy (perhaps coming home late at night only to sexually, physically, and verbally -- and hence mentally -- abuse you), then you have no choice but to just kill him. I'd still not consider this at all, but this is just to say that sometimes, there's a reason for doing it, and the only way you can save your life is by killing the person who is making your life a living hell for you.

I'd still suggest the person finds a way to escape physically, or turn to some social/humanitarian organizations for help. There are many such in the west (even Muslim ones), so you have options. Avoid yourself the guilt of having killed someone and just turn to someone or some place for help. However, in my opinion, you won't be wrong in killing for self-defense purposes.

Those who think that women often INCITE their husbands to beat them are absolutely wrong. Just because someone does something to anger you doens't mean you do such a despicable thing. Besides, it's not like wives are never angered by their husbands :| But what are THEY expected to do, other than just be patient and humble and whatnot? Please. No one wants to be hurt, no one wants to be beaten, no one wants to be hated. But we're all humans. We're gonna do things that our partners don't like, be it in anger or intentionally or mistakenly. It doesn't mean you get beaten for it.

But, of course, I'd personally have to be in an abusive situation to decide what I'd do in reality. God forbid any of us ever end up in such circumstances, though!

[єѕαρχαι]

How about if we put it like this.
There is this american female marine chasing you with her m16.
she is firing at you to kill you.
fortuntely you find a gun on the ground and there is no way to run away.
what would you do ?

[parsiwaan]

Just as nothing would ever justify hitting a man, nothing justifies hitting a woman either. A man who dares to lay a hand on his wife does not deserve to be around ANY human -- including his own wife and kids.

I must add, though, I know of women who say that they'd hit their husbands if such and such happened, and then you ask them, "If you did the same thing and he hit you for it, what would you do?" And they go, "Oh no! No way! I would NEVER let him hit me." And I'm like, "But you just said you'd hit him if he did such and such thing."
I don't support double standards.

So, I can't ever support hitting of an adult -- let alone KILLING!

Oh, wait, though. Has anyone watched the movie "Provoked"? It's a true story, according to the producers. It's about this Indian woman who had an arranged marriage (I'm not sure if it was forced or not), and she goes to England with her husband right after their wedding. Her husband turns out to be an abusive beast, and she bears him for ten years. So, one night, he almost presses a hot, burning iron on her face, and she decides that she's had enough. That night, she contemplates killing him for about two hours and finally figures out how to do it: Burning him while he's asleep.

I don't know if the beast died, but she gets sent to jail for it because, according to the court, "It wasn't really self-defense. You thought about it for a couple of hours before resorting to killing him. If you'd killed him instantly, right after he almost put the burning iron on your face, then that may have been acceptable. But this way, you deserve to be punished." Unfortunately for her, almost all the people involved in the court were males, and the only female there ... wasn't supportive (if I remember correctly). It was in jail that she learned to read and write and meet other women who had also killed their husbands to save their own lives. She was like, "You all don't feel guilty?" And some said yes, but others were like, "Please. Feel guilty for having killed a man who almost killed ME? Not at all!" Being an easterner, she didn't believe in revealing her private life to anyone, so no one knew. But she finally opened up to this one lady in her cell, and the lady happened to have a brother who was a lawyer, who ended up supporting her. She was also introduced to some Indian organizations opting for giving shelter and a voice to abused women, so she got lucky that way as well.

So, yeah, the only time I'd support killing someone is when you have to defend your own life. If you're not allowed to divorce the person (as is the case with some, not all, couples) and you hate your life and you fear for life day in and day out while your partner is enjoying it like crazy (perhaps coming home late at night only to sexually, physically, and verbally -- and hence mentally -- abuse you), then you have no choice but to just kill him. I'd still not consider this at all, but this is just to say that sometimes, there's a reason for doing it, and the only way you can save your life is by killing the person who is making your life a living hell for you.

I'd still suggest the person finds a way to escape physically, or turn to some social/humanitarian organizations for help. There are many such in the west (even Muslim ones), so you have options. Avoid yourself the guilt of having killed someone and just turn to someone or some place for help. However, in my opinion, you won't be wrong in killing for self-defense purposes.

Those who think that women often INCITE their husbands to beat them are absolutely wrong. Just because someone does something to anger you doens't mean you do such a despicable thing. Besides, it's not like wives are never angered by their husbands :| But what are THEY expected to do, other than just be patient and humble and whatnot? Please. No one wants to be hurt, no one wants to be beaten, no one wants to be hated. But we're all humans. We're gonna do things that our partners don't like, be it in anger or intentionally or mistakenly. It doesn't mean you get beaten for it.

But, of course, I'd personally have to be in an abusive situation to decide what I'd do in reality. God forbid any of us ever end up in such circumstances, though!

ahahha now that is a weak feministic excuse/argument...she deserve to be in prison..he abused and hit her..all she could do is call 911… and go to social service..they would have protect her... but no she did not do that…instead she burn the guy alive.

[parsiwaan]

How about if we put it like this.
There is this american female marine chasing you with her m16.
she is firing at you to kill you.
fortuntely you find a gun on the ground and there is no way to run away.
what would you do ?

I would simple wake up and say Nalaat ba kaar e bad e Shytan and spit on my left side(hopefully someone is not sleeping there ahhaha) and go back to sleep...hope this time i see Monica Bellucia chasing me instead of a us marine.

[Roshina]

ahahha now that is a weak feministic excuse/argument...she deserve to be in prison..he abused and hit her..all she could do is call 911… and go to social service..they would have protect her... but no she did not do that…instead she burn the guy alive.

Actually, I work with a women's shelter here where I live, and lemme tell you that it takes GUTS for an abused woman to turn to help, especially an eastern woman. She fears for her reputation, her name, her parents' name -- everything. So she never tells anyone either.

I believe the woman in the movie did the perfect thing by burning her husband for what he did to her for ten years. She'd suffered enough, and, like many women in her situation, she had no way out. If she divorced, we know what would happen to her; we know what society would do to her. If she ran away from him, we know then, too, what society would say about her. Everyone would ignore the fact that he had killed her emotionally and mentally; no one would put the blame on the man -- everyone would put the blame on her only. Sure, that she ended up killing him ALSO means society will blame her for everything (according to my mom, for example, she deserves to go to hell for having killed her husband regardless of what her husband was guilty of). But this way, at least, she doesn't have to live in fear anymore. I mean, imagine: Every day, you're HAPPY that your husband is not home but at the same time, you fear that when he comes home, he will be angry and will rape you and abuse you in every other way. To some people, such a life is not worth living. I've read real stories of women who have committed suicide because they lived that way. (Remember, though. I don't remember if he actually died. But I wouldn't at all be upset or heartbroken if he had died.)

This particular woman, however, clearly didn't wanna kill herself. She wanted to live life. She appreciated life in spite of what her abusive, inhumane husband made her life to be.

However, we must also remember that EVERY situation of abuse is different. What should be done when depends entirely on the severity of the abuse. For example, a mere slap or a shoe thrown at you would not, in my opinion, incite the same response from the woman as would a severe beating or kick in a delicate part, especially during pregnancy. (I know of women who have suffered miscarriages because their husbands hit them in the stomach or threw something hard at them while they were pregnant.)