Amir al Ghaznavi 1000 Post Celebration

[BarakzaiAbdali]

Investigation afterwards found a homing chip planted near the Amir's throne... he survived... many did not. Next to the homing chip was a Hamza Yusuf tape, an empty bottle of jack daniels, and lipstick

[Manzareh]

LOL, later did they find him in a hole like saddam or in a tunnel like gaddafi

[Amir al Ghaznavi]

*releases a video recording from an undisclosed location*

*shows obvious signs of injury*

*hair however, remains impecably groomed*

My fellow PFers, i have been made the victim of an unforgivable act of treachery

My 1000 post celebration, meant to be a joyous occasion, is now synonymous with tragedy

Although i survived this brutal assault, many of my Kakarano bodyguards and Persian harem women did not

The Amir of course sheds no tears over a woman, for they can easily be replaced. But Kakar blood is Precious

Who was the guilty party?

Was it the Shamalis who sought to silence a voice of Pashtun rights?
Was it the Durranais who had always rejected the Amirs claim to the throne?
Was it the Ghiljais who had bristled at my most recent attempts at taxation?
Was it the Pakistanis who had always opposed my Pashtun nationalism?
Was it the Iranians, who feared the Amirs attempts to highlight Ariana as a legitimate co inheritor of the ancient Aryan Persian empire?
Was it the Americans who opposed my anti war stance?
Was it other clan of Kakars who rejected my Nekzai attempt to supplant itself as Khan khels?
Was it Pashtun nationalists who rejected my stance towards Loy Afghanistan?
Was it secular communists who rejected my Sharia based rule?
Was it Islamic extremists who rejected my personal Godlessness?
Was it the father/brother/husband of a damsel I had seduced?
Was it Graveyard of Empires whose sexual abuse at the hands of northern Militias had led him to blame me for failing to offer protection?
Was it conservative Pashtun elders who rejected my emancipatory policies towards women?
Was it drug cartels who opposed my anti drug policies?
Was it a disgruntled damsel?

Rest assured the Imperial Guard and Mukhabarat will investigate this matter thoroughly, leaving no stone unturned, until justice is achieved

There will be no rest for the wicked, no mercy for the cruel

[Leonine]

someone clearly has a lot of time these days outside of canadian television

[Amir al Ghaznavi]

someone clearly has a lot of time these days outside of canadian television

well it aint the guy who was stuck investigating a fraud claim till 930pm

[SUMMERLOVE]

Can I comb your hair. Please!!!!!