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  • #16
    Originally posted by Qrratugai View Post
    Thanks, but not all women need you to look after them, wrora We can take care of ourselves. We ask you to respect us, just like we respect you, but you don't need to cross limits and *demand* anything of us, or TELL us what to do, or *make* us follow our culture/religion. We have our own minds that we know very well how to use, k? In fact, mind you, some women know how to use their minds much better than even some men. So, to be honest, I think there are instances in which it should be the other way around: Women watching out for men because the latter (i.e., men) are far more weaker and less smart.
    But khor there is a limit that shouldn't be crossed, Sure you can do whatever you want but in the west you need to look after yourself and wear proper clothes, I see girls wearing hijab and a tights jeans showing off their butts...Whats the point of the hijab.
    I am sorry but I am not a mean guy but I want my family to be respectful and want them to act like a proper pashtun.

    The girls is going to hate me here I guess but I am just being honest sisters

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    • #17
      Originally posted by rihana
      Why are men always so worried and focused about us? Is it because of insecurity? I always hear the same excuse that its honor. But dont all men care about the honor of there woman or do our men care more?


      Lets discuss this and find out is it our culture, and why are we so worried? I have a Pashtana friend and her husband makes her wear a niqab, IF you ask him why you make her wear it, His response is, "Her honor must be defended"
      Well if we are born in a culture where a woman has a limited rights ..what we can do … we can’t ignore the rights of our culture …
      Other culture has different living lifes .. different thinks .. but infact our is not matching them at all.
      But every single right that is given in our culture to the woman is an example of past living lifes for woman in Islam ……..... which is 100% right … and we should pround …. even arabs (the real ppls) ignoring the actual woman limited rights. .
      and Allah know better.

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      • #18
        Originally posted by aftab.yusufzai View Post
        But every single right that is given in our culture to the woman is an example of past living lifes for woman in Islam ……..... which is 100% right … and we should pround
        Are you so very sure about this, wror jaana? Can you give some examples of the rights that Islam has given women that our culture also gives us? Please?

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        • #19
          Originally posted by Master Khan View Post
          But khor there is a limit that shouldn't be crossed, Sure you can do whatever you want but in the west you need to look after yourself and wear proper clothes, I see girls wearing hijab and a tights jeans showing off their butts...Whats the point of the hijab.
          I am sorry but I am not a mean guy but I want my family to be respectful and want them to act like a proper pashtun.

          The girls is going to hate me here I guess but I am just being honest sisters
          Oh, no, no, wrora! I'm not saying don't explain to your women what is right and wrong. But I'm saying listen to them as well. You don't always know what's best for your women; sometimes they know even better than you do, and other times, they know themselves better what's right and wrong.

          And I believe in communication: Express your thoughts to them, and leave it at that. If you use force, you're going to LOSE more than you'll ever earn.

          Also, you have a right over your own family, NOT over other families. For instance, if my daughter does something that you don't like, I will not allow you to tell her to fix herself. Well, you can tell her all you want, but I might disagree with you, and I will have to tell her to ignore what you're saying because you have absolutely no rights over her.

          Education is good, but force is bad, bad, bad x 10000.

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          • #20
            Originally posted by handsomepashtun
            ^That is westernized mindset.
            So? Is every single thing about the western mindset wrong or improper in your opinion?

            Labeling things isn't always a great idea. Look at the content of the mindset, not what it's called.

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            • #21
              Originally posted by Qrratugai View Post
              Oh, no, no, wrora! I'm not saying don't explain to your women what is right and wrong. But I'm saying listen to them as well. You don't always know what's best for your women; sometimes they know even better than you do, and other times, they know themselves better what's right and wrong.

              And I believe in communication: Express your thoughts to them, and leave it at that. If you use force, you're going to LOSE more than you'll ever earn.

              Also, you have a right over your own family, NOT over other families. For instance, if my daughter does something that you don't like, I will not allow you to tell her to fix herself. Well, you can tell her all you want, but I might disagree with you, and I will have to tell her to ignore what you're saying because you have absolutely no rights over her.

              Education is good, but force is bad, bad, bad x 10000.
              Like Mullah Bijli Ghar saids, Chi kam kaas chi khaza barrbandy bar preedi no akka kaas daala dy, chi kam kaas daala ta daala nawai no akha um daala dy.
              Last edited by Master Khan; 06-10-2010, 05:25 PM.

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              • #22
                Originally posted by Master Khan View Post
                Like Mullah Bijli Ghar saids, Chi kam kaas chi khaza barrbandy bar preedi no akka kaas daala dy, chi kam kaas daala ta daala nawai no akha um daala dy.
                And you think Mullah Bijligar represents truth, sincerity, honesty for me? :D Because, my dear brother, he doesn't. So why should I care what he says or how he defines honor or respect for women? I appreciate his opinion, but I'm not obligated to accept it.

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                • #23
                  Originally posted by Qrratugai View Post
                  And you think Mullah Bijligar represents truth, sincerity, honesty for me? :D Because, my dear brother, he doesn't. So why should I care what he says or how he defines honor or respect for women? I appreciate his opinion, but I'm not obligated to accept it.
                  What ever Mullah Bijligar saids is true, even my mum said he is right.
                  Mullah Bijligar is a good muslim and pashtun.

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                  • #24
                    Originally posted by Master Khan View Post
                    What ever Mullah Bijligar saids is true, even my mum said he is right.
                    Mullah Bijligar is good muslim and pashtun.
                    LOL ... Master Khana That's very innocent thinking. lol. I'm glad your mom agrees with you, but that still doesn't explain why I or anyone else should agree.

                    Khair, to you be your opinions, to me be mine!

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                    • #25
                      Originally posted by Qrratugai View Post
                      LOL ... Master Khana That's very innocent thinking. lol. I'm glad your mom agrees with you, but that still doesn't explain why I or anyone else should agree.

                      Khair, to you be your opinions, to me be mine!
                      you should watch his videos, I beileve what he said is right.
                      he is funny aswell.
                      he mostly speaks about womens in Punjab
                      Last edited by Master Khan; 06-10-2010, 05:50 PM.

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                      • #26
                        Originally posted by Qrratugai View Post
                        Are you so very sure about this, wror jaana? Can you give some examples of the rights that Islam has given women that our culture also gives us? Please?
                        Khwagi khor .. Assalamoalikum ..

                        Its a big discussion if we go for ..and which will never end up ..

                        You are an example of all your questions if u can realized it.

                        yeah i admit also that some part of jahalat avaibility in past times ... but today its not the same.

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                        • #27
                          Originally posted by Aseer Jaan
                          Don't tell your woman what's right and what's wrong?

                          Qrratugai, how much sense does that make? We have a right to correct them when they are wrong. It's for the exact same reason 1 out of every 2 marriages in the USA is a divorce.
                          USA and Pashtun are different culture, USA wala kho asi om kharab shawi.
                          USA walay kho daalagan di

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                          • #28
                            If you don't tell your wife, sister, daughter the right things like Religion, Cuture, Pashto then they will end like the people they hang about with in School, Collage and Uni e.g. wearing their styal clothes, make up etc.
                            in the West they will be in class with mix sex so they will be with Black people, paakis, Africas etc so you need to teach them their culture, religion because if you let do whatever they want then it could damage them big time.
                            I know paakis that married jamacains, Sikhs etc, So thats why I will look after the females in my family...I will just leave my daughters in my village to be honest.

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                            • #29
                              Originally posted by AmrikayayPashtun
                              Well said Master Khan, We dont need Amerikinization.
                              manana wrora, nice to see someone in sense.

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                              • #30
                                Originally posted by Aseer Jaan
                                Don't tell your woman what's right and what's wrong?

                                Qrratugai, how much sense does that make? We have a right to correct them when they are wrong. It's for the exact same reason 1 out of every 2 marriages in the USA is a divorce.
                                Yes, but do you think we should also have a right to tell you what is right and wrong? I don't think anything she is saying is wrong. But, IT GOES BOTH WAYS. Don't tell us what to do if you don't think we should be able to voice our opinion as well.

                                But, the bottom line is, if you want to gain the respect and love from your wife, don't TELL her what to do. Suggest. But, problem would be solved and you would not need to marry if you married a pious girl anyway - this wouldn't even be a discussion!

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