Marriage to non-Pashtuns

[Nokia_Apridy]

Seem like having extra-marital relationship has become a normality in Pashtuns as well. Or is it that the men have a licence to screw but the girls should respect their Culture/ Religion /Num / Namoos / This / That etc and etc and etc and etc and etc.

I have few questions for the guys that are so very proudly confessing to having been with many girls.

The Questions are:

1. Would you be so casual about these relationships if a female from your immediate family was having such relationships?

2. Is Respect, Dignity, Nanung, Namoos, Haya, Ghairat, only for pashtun Women?

Sallamona Lala :
Bya za khpala KHor Lor Punjabi walay na warkwam ?..
wos ta Zwab raka...
Awo Za khpala khawra da KHOR awo LOR da para da
nang namos haya Ghariat Khwana (Sabak) khyam
nu pa cha da sa shi ZOOR da....
Lala za Haga PUKHTUN na yam Awal Saray Oyjam
awo bya Ya Tapos wakam chay da Ba banday ma Oyjalu
Da KHOOR LOOR HAq za darta QASAM sra
yam chay sumra ya HAQ da haga na yu
1 % pa bara (pasa) sar ta raswam ...

3. Is Pashtunwali a mere tool through which we Pashtun men control Pashtun women?

1. Would you be so casual about these relationships if a female from your immediate family was having such relationships?

Sallamona Lala :
Bya za khpala KHor Lor Punjabi walay na warkwam ?..
wos ta Zwab raka...
Awo Za khpala khawra da KHOR awo LOR da para da
nang namos haya Ghariat Khwana (Sabak) khyam
nu pa cha da sa shi ZOOR da....
Lala za Haga PUKHTUN na yam Awal Saray Oyjam
awo bya Ya Tapos wakam chay da Ba banday ma Oyjalu
Da KHOOR LOOR HAq za darta QASAM sra
yam chay sumra ya HAQ da haga na yu
1 % pa bara (pasa) sar ta raswam ...

2. Is Respect, Dignity, Nanung, Namoos, Haya, Ghairat, only for pashtun Women?

Bya ba Sa lekam ba Para Tapaley Shwey Lekanu ka
Zwob (answer) wagora...
Awo da Chay KHOOR loor dalta da PUKHTUN forum
da nu da har PUKHTUN KHOOR loor zma khor di...

[Azad Khel]

would you be so casual about these relationships if a female from your immediate family was having such relationships?

zabardast.......................

[Sangeen]

@ Nokia Apredy, with all due respect my friend i can not make out anything that you have written. I dont know what is it that you are trying to prove here by writing Pashto in Latin alphabets.....

If you are showing your love for Pashto then why dont you learn to write pashto and then write pashto the way it should be written.. that is writing pashto in pashto's own alphabets.

What you are doing is kind of defying the objective as i can not understand what you have written.

Only sentence that I have actually understood is this one.

Bya za khpala KHor Lor Punjabi walay na warkwam ?

If you mean that: "Then why should i give (marry) my sister or daughter to Punjabi?"

If this what you mean then let me ask you one simple question: WHO ARE YOU TO DECIDE WHOM SHOULD YOUR SISTER OR DAUGHTER MARRY?
WHO GIVES YOU THIS RIGHT TO MAKE THIS DECISION FOR THEM?

If it is only your choice and the girl's choice isnt taken into account about whom she should marry then would this marriage be valid? And i am Talking about validity in Shariyah cause no matter how good a marriage is according to Pashtunwali if it isnt right by Shariyah the marriage isnt valid and the children will be out of wedlock ... meaning *******s.


Will you please elaborate on this point for me please.

Thanking you in advance.

[Azad Khel]

i ll try translating this for you djz

when i am with a girl and i call her my "girlfriend", basically ... There is an implicit agreement between her and i that we are not bound by any agreement for future plans....so when later i dump her or maker her dump me because ...i am bored of her ...naturally....i don't feel guilty about the break up...thats why i don't feel like i am getting away with any "crime" per say...that's just fact ...because those are the "rules of the game"...and i am just a playa ...beeep beeep



i am an honest guy...
most of these guys here have had girl friends too but they say "oh i can do it because i am not fooling anyone here ...just not making things "official" with my other loves ones ...like my family who are a bit too old school and don't like to know the details of my "private affairs...but others shouldn't do it because they are all lustful and have bad intentions"...so because i am known as a professional macdaddy i am actually opening the eyes of the people...unlike the hypocrites who just want to hog all the fun for themselves....you see? I am the good guy...

i refuse to do the undignified even under the shadow of anonymity" - literally that translates to "i aint gonna shag no skank undercover"
i am a legitimate pick up artist and i am coming out of the closet...and i am proud...and unashamed...hence, i have integrity.

simply put, integrity means being the same as you are as in the absence of watching eyes.










its not my fault the girl is too scared of losing me already that she avoids the topic of marriage...
it's not my fault allah made me charming and "viral"
if i gave my word (which i never did ) and went back on it ...then in that case...i am a cheater...and cheaters never prosper.

(you dun have to thank me for this one... )

Bia di Dagha Post Pa Di Forum Bandi Asan Krholo
Zaar Sham Al-Chemista Taa Da Zahro Gurha Jorha Krha

[Nokia_Apridy]

@ Nokia Apredy, with all due respect my friend i can not make out anything that you have written. I dont know what is it that you are trying to prove here by writing Pashto in Latin alphabets.....

If you are showing your love for Pashto then why dont you learn to write pashto and then write pashto the way it should be written.. that is writing pashto in pashto's own alphabets.

What you are doing is kind of defying the objective as i can not understand what you have written.

Only sentence that I have actually understood is this one.

Bya za khpala KHor Lor Punjabi walay na warkwam ?

If you mean that: "Then why should i give (marry) my sister or daughter to Punjabi?"

If this what you mean then let me ask you one simple question: WHO ARE YOU TO DECIDE WHOM SHOULD YOUR SISTER OR DAUGHTER MARRY?
WHO GIVES YOU THIS RIGHT TO MAKE THIS DECISION FOR THEM?

If it is only your choice and the girl's choice isnt taken into account about whom she should marry then would this marriage be valid? And i am Talking about validity in Shariyah cause no matter how good a marriage is according to Pashtunwali if it isnt right by Shariyah the marriage isnt valid and the children will be out of wedlock ... meaning *******s.


Will you please elaborate on this point for me please.

Thanking you in advance.

Agree....

Khu Zma Khoor Ba ....

BAY PUKHTU kar wankey INSHALLAH pura bawar ma da

[Nokia_Apridy]

@ Nokia Apredy, with all due respect my friend i can not make out anything that you have written. I dont know what is it that you are trying to prove here by writing Pashto in Latin alphabets.....

If you are showing your love for Pashto then why dont you learn to write pashto and then write pashto the way it should be written.. that is writing pashto in pashto's own alphabets.


What you are doing is kind of defying the objective as i can not understand what you have written.

Only sentence that I have actually understood is this one.

Bya za khpala KHor Lor Punjabi walay na warkwam ?

If you mean that: "Then why should i give (marry) my sister or daughter to Punjabi?"

If this what you mean then let me ask you one simple question: WHO ARE YOU TO DECIDE WHOM SHOULD YOUR SISTER OR DAUGHTER MARRY?
WHO GIVES YOU THIS RIGHT TO MAKE THIS DECISION FOR THEM?

If it is only your choice and the girl's choice isnt taken into account about whom she should marry then would this marriage be valid? And i am Talking about validity in Shariyah cause no matter how good a marriage is according to Pashtunwali if it isnt right by Shariyah the marriage isnt valid and the children will be out of wedlock ... meaning *******s.


Will you please elaborate on this point for me please.

Thanking you in advance.

If you are showing your love for Pashto then why dont you learn to write pashto and then write pashto the way it should be written.. that is writing pashto in pashto's own alphabets.

Khbara da Pa Gull badala..

INSHALLAH lagya yam chay Pukhtu

lekan awo lostal pura ezda kam

[Sangeen]

Agree....

Khu Zma Khoor Ba ....

BAY PUKHTU kar wankey INSHALLAH pura bawar ma da

When you want to say something use correct words and correct way.

Dont say i will not allow sister to marry punjabi.

Say "I will educate my sister to make better decisions about choosing her husband when it comes to marriage"

You can not even imagine how frustrating it can be when others make the decisions for you. And that's when you see these women running away from homes etc.

i will quote one of my previous posts here please read it carefuly,

".... Should Pashtun marry a non-pashtun?

My answer in nut shell is: I will not advise it.
Why?
Cause they will do small little things that will irritate the hell out of you. Things such as she may not give as much of "Milmastya" to your guests as much a pashtun woman would. If you are a Pashtun woman married to a Punjabi man, he may very proudly break wind in front of everyone. In nut shell it is not easy to live your life with someone that is so different then you.

I do wish We were not following our own cultures and Islam was the only culture amongst all ethnicities but unfortunately it is not the case.

So if you want an easy life marry someone from your own ethnic background.

But (for Pashtun men) if you find someone that has adopted ISLAM as her culture and is totally free of other cultural influences then she is better then any best pashtun cause he is following the path of ALLAH has chosen for us.

would I recommend a pashtun lady to marry a very good Muslim but ethnically punjabi guy?

I will say she better Not cause after marriage she will have to live with his family. The good Muslim Punjabi guy may be a very good man but his family or extended family may not be as good as him and she will get hurt by things that may be thrown at her from others around her. A pashtun girl may marry a revert Muslim man provided he is independent from his family, can provide for her and she can be sure that his reversion is not temporary.

These are not my opinions these are facts .... i can give you 100s of examples for each of the above statements.

Finally, we should not or even can not "tell" our sisters or daughters whom they can and whom they can not marry. We can only advise and educate them. what quite often happens is that we don't full-fill our end of the deal -the education and advice- and when they express a desire of dong something that isn't good for them we fall upon them like a tonne of bricks telling them they can not go to school they can not meet their friends etc etc. This type of careless attitude has create resentment and even rebellion in or women folk. I know many girl that has ran away from homes and many has even turned their back on not only pashtun culture but even on Islam...."[/B][/B][/B]

[kakargirl]

Agree....

Khu Zma Khoor Ba ....

BAY PUKHTU kar wankey INSHALLAH pura bawar ma da

apridy wror you write beautiful pashtu i can understand it fine even though i'm kandahrian pashtun ,wrora i know your people in uk they are such strict devoted people your apridys girls mashallah live very happy lifes with their own apridy boys i was wondering if you knowany of the family in leeds and bradford, i know alot of apridys from peshawer khyber pass, kohat very nice people wrora very traditionlist even in uk mashallah .

[IamDZJ]

pashtun has a brain of his/her own so i don't see why he/she should need my stamp of approval to validate his/her decision either way.

[torkham]

there is only one thing you need to know really well. do you want your children to speak the language you speak with your pakhtun mother/father.

if you know the answer to this question, you have an answer. yes, then marry pakhtun.

having children raised in islam can be achieved by parent of different nationality, but if you want you children to be pakhtun, marry pakhtun, so your children speak pakhto, understand pakhtun culture, speak/understand the people of their kor and kilai.

[divide_et_impera]

1) Pashto has no "own alphabet". The Arabic alphabet isn't even suitable to take into account the vast sprectrum of Pashto phonology. In fact, among other factors this very alphabet is responsible for the shortcomings when it comes to the social status of Pashto.
2) What about the Christian and Hindu marriages if only a Sharia marriage is valid? And above all, what about all the marriages among our ancestors from pre-islamic times? According to your logic we live in a world full of Haramis!
3) On the other hand, I agree with you when you say that a marriage contract founded on Qu'anic rules (what the hell is Sharia?)* would require the consent of bothe spouses-to-be.
4) *Sharia is subverted by a great deal of pre-islamic, archaic and barbarian Arab rules and traditions(lapidations or stonings, amputations, lashings).
5) Hence any kind of marriage is valid that is contracted by an authority which is generally accepted by the society, regardless of the question if it takes its legitimacy from religious or social and cultural standards.

[divide_et_impera]

"I do wish We were not following our own cultures".
.
May I ask you why you write on Pashtun forums then?

[Nokia_Apridy]

Ufffffffffffffffffff KHUDAYA Sanga mung daga Wrazay ta jwanday prakhay

wam Malgaro wabkhay da Zma EHSAS da keday shi taso warta

kha waye ........

Sangen lala ...Lag rata pa Detail ka waleka...pa da video ka

YouTube - Betrayed Afghan girl's fight: India's Army Chief reacts

[Sangeen]

there is only one thing you need to know really well. do you want your children to speak the language you speak with your pakhtun mother/father.

if you know the answer to this question, you have an answer. yes, then marry pakhtun.

having children raised in islam can be achieved by parent of different nationality, but if you want you children to be pakhtun, marry pakhtun, so your children speak pakhto, understand pakhtun culture, speak/understand the people of their kor and kilai.

I dont care if my children can speak Pashto or not. I will teach them Arabic as their first language after that IF they want to learn Pashto then fine otherwise i can not give a two bit crap about it.

What difference will it make is they can or can not speak Pashto????????

[Dreamer]

I dont care if my children can speak Pashto or not. I will teach them Arabic as their first language after that IF they want to learn Pashto then fine otherwise i can not give a two bit crap about it.

What difference will it make is they can or can not speak Pashto????????

it doesnt really matter at all...