a muslim woman's attitude towards polygamy

[IamDZJ]

seriously..you guys ought to be ashamed of yourselves. what ever makes you think any of you can pass on as a muslim woman?

[Wrayun]

Ladies, take it easy. Marriage is a thing of the past, these traditional unions are fast dying out. Haven't you paid attention? In most Western countries marriages rarely last more then the first year. Marriage is now like a fashion statement. You can get hitched in Vegas one night and the next day you are divorced.

I once asked a very secular, big time lesbian friend (my fav boss) a question....why is it that in the West, only the women have dreams and fantasies over their wedding days? You know the big wedding, the chapel, the dress, the guests, the cards etc. etc. You never ever, ever, EVERRR, find men in the West who dream about their weddings (that only happens back home). Her humble response was "Wrayun, when there are plenty and different types of fish in the sea, why stick to tuna?" If you can get milk, no need to keep a cow.

Marriage, whether with a single female or 4, is disadvantageous to us selfish men. It requires commitment, it requires responsibility. Personally speaking as a selfish man, I rather be a 'baby daddy' to a whole bunch of 'baby mamas' then be a husband to 4 wives. That way, I hit it and quit it, never be responsible financially to the blood sucking vampires. Keep my hair and my life worth to me self.....And if something does happen in between, I don't mind paying child support as long as I ain't taking the kids to soccer games every morning before work. I'm just not made for that.

The moral of the point: while you are busy worrying about the utopian concept of marriage between one man and one woman, modern day societies are too busy doing away with that. If you want to see true selfishness of men then read the above all over. A selfish man will never commit to a relationship, whether it be to one or 4. Polygamy in Islam is prescribed for various reasons, and polygamy in a secular society can serve legitimate, rational, venues too. Let us admit that it is not for everyone, but let us also agree that there is more to it then "selfish man" and his uncontrollable apatite.

No need to demonize us men.

[tor_khan]

No need to demonize us men.

Precisely.

[Haneef]

None of you women will have true taqwa until and unless you can accept that having more than 1 wife is allowed and a Sunnah of the prophet SAW. That is when we put our desires apart and accept the truth, until then we are just making a mockery of Islam.

[Haneef]

Ladies, take it easy. Marriage is a thing of the past, these traditional unions are fast dying out. Haven't you paid attention? In most Western countries marriages rarely last more then the first year. Marriage is now like a fashion statement. You can get hitched in Vegas one night and the next day you are divorced.

I once asked a very secular, big time lesbian friend (my fav boss) a question....why is it that in the West, only the women have dreams and fantasies over their wedding days? You know the big wedding, the chapel, the dress, the guests, the cards etc. etc. You never ever, ever, EVERRR, find men in the West who dream about their weddings (that only happens back home). Her humble response was "Wrayun, when there are plenty and different types of fish in the sea, why stick to tuna?" If you can get milk, no need to keep a cow.

Marriage, whether with a single female or 4, is disadvantageous to us selfish men. It requires commitment, it requires responsibility. Personally speaking as a selfish man, I rather be a 'baby daddy' to a whole bunch of 'baby mamas' then be a husband to 4 wives. That way, I hit it and quit it, never be responsible financially to the blood sucking vampires. Keep my hair and my life worth to me self.....And if something does happen in between, I don't mind paying child support as long as I ain't taking the kids to soccer games every morning before work. I'm just not made for that.

The moral of the point: while you are busy worrying about the utopian concept of marriage between one man and one woman, modern day societies are too busy doing away with that. If you want to see true selfishness of men then read the above all over. A selfish man will never commit to a relationship, whether it be to one or 4. Polygamy in Islam is prescribed for various reasons, and polygamy in a secular society can serve legitimate, rational, venues too. Let us admit that it is not for everyone, but let us also agree that there is more to it then "selfish man" and his uncontrollable apatite.

No need to demonize us men.

Were you born out of wedlock? was a cow kept? Think before you speak.

[Abu Hurayrah]

Were you born out of wedlock? was a cow kept? Think before you speak.

It almost seems this guy is searching for other kinds of fish on this forum aswell

[Haneef]

Possibly...its sad to see people want to contribute to the 48% of children being born out of wedlock.

We may have kids, but I don't want to be a father. What happened to the ghairat of these pashtana? Where are the men at? We want to sleep with people's daughters and sisters, and then if we have kids, well we don't care.

[Abu Hurayrah]

Haneef,
We aren't making a mockery, we as individuals are sayin we can't tolerate it.

can you tolerate your wife having 2 husbands?

Think about it.

That's a wrong comparison, since a man is allowed to marry 4 women on the given conditions.

It is understandable that a women would not want this, most of the women, but there are also women who don't object to it (if the man is a pious man), since Allah tolerated it.

[شمله ور خراساني]

Haneef,
We aren't making a mockery, we as individuals are sayin we can't tolerate it.

can you tolerate your wife having 2 husbands?

Think about it.

it is not very pious to have objections against that which allah has made lawful for muslims.

[IamDZJ]

If being a human being is making me less of a muslim than that is what I m. Can we start searching for answers from there?

[Feroza_Banu]

As a married woman... and as smeone who knows her rights under Islam, I would definitely ask for "khula"...(All powers are unto ALlah swt and I will do whatever he wishes)

I understand and i accept the fact that men are allowed to marry more than once at the same time... but in Islam i have a right to ask for separation If i dont see myself coping with this situation. He has rights, then so do I!.

My husband is well aware of who i am, how i am, and what i am. and the fact that i don't need him to survive financially or socially. The reason why i would need him is for his love and support. If he wishes to marry someone else, obviously he doesn't have enough love in his heart for me and enough regards for my feelings either. He is not able to provide that to me then what is the use of having a life partner? I don't need his money, and he can't be there for me emotionally and mentally then lets not have him all together... he will be a waste of space lol.

and i am the type of person who expects love in return when i love someone. I am not the "hindi drama" woman who just believes in giving love and support to her husband and in laws and the whole world and not expect anything back. i have expectations from my husband. My husband should care about my happiness more than anything else in this world, and i do the same.. his happiness means a world to me. I do everything in my power to take care of him... but if he doesn't do the same for me then he doesn't deserve me... simple as that

[Wrayun]

Were you born out of wedlock? was a cow kept? Think before you speak.

In the world of the blind, the one eye man is king. What is it, am I surrounded by simpletons?

[akbarkhan]

Were you born out of wedlock? was a cow kept? Think before you speak.

If you read between the lines he implying the contrary.

[Dust]

Multiple marriages are not something new. It did not start with the Quran. Moreover, I have yet to find from pre-Islamic times that a woman had more than one husband.

Europe could have really benefited from polygamy after WWII.

[akbarkhan]

I have yet to find from pre-Islamic times that a woman had more than one husband.

You will now.

Polyandry can be traced to Lagash and even earlier than that?