Men and Women in Islam

[MeemWawMeemNoon]

This topic was requested by some members.

I will start this thread off by presenting the Quranic verses that are recited during the nikaah ceremony of a marriage between a man and a woman. These verses should shed light about men and women in Islam; further, these verses should lead us to discussing this topic productively. These verse will lead us to uncovering other jems that are in the Holy Quran.

The reason why I want to start off with these verses is because I believe that a man and a woman come together for mutual needs in a marriage contract--there is no "I" in team.

A marriage contract in Islam should lead to the understanding of what are the established roles of a man and a woman in Islam.

Please remember that if there is ever a dispute over a translation of a Quranic verse, we must consult the original Arabic.

May Allah grants us all the ability to understanding His Noble Book, the Holy Quran.

[MeemWawMeemNoon]

Our Creator says in the Holy Quran:

4:1 O mankind! reverence your Guardian-Lord, who created you from a single person, created, of like nature, His mate, and from them twain scattered (like seeds) countless men and women;- reverence Allah, through whom ye demand your mutual (rights), and (reverence) the wombs (That bore you): for Allah ever watches over you.

33:70 O ye who believe! Fear Allah, and (always) say a word directed to the Right:
33:71 That He may make your conduct whole and sound and forgive you your sins: He that obeys Allah and His Messenger, has already attained the highest achievement.

59:18 O ye who believe! Fear Allah, and let every soul look to what (provision) He has sent forth for the morrow. Yea, fear Allah. for Allah is well-acquainted with (all) that ye do.

[MeemWawMeemNoon]

In the above verses the word اتقوا, fear, i.e. fear of Allah, has been used 5 times by Allah. From this we can tell that in order to have a successful marriage the two parties, that is wife and husband, must fear Allah, otherwise, it would be really hard for them to have a happy marriage.

One may ask why bring Allah into the matter? Well, the reason being is that there are certain rights that a man has over his wife and there are certain rights that a woman has over her husband. If they both fear Allah and remember Allah in their marriage then they will discharge their duties and not allow pride to come in-between them and their spouse.

[MeemWawMeemNoon]

The next thing to do, which is why this thread was created, is to highlight what are those rights that a man and a woman has in Islam.

[*Mahzala*]

Mu'min, great start. I am yet to share a series about marriage, women, men and intimacy between them from an Islamic point of view. Something tells me it will be quite popular.

Keep it coming InshaAllah.

[MeemWawMeemNoon]

^You have to help me out. I have a lot of topics going on. Please feel free, and this is to anyone, to chip in. I will make sure that we don't go off topic or deviate with what we are taught in Islam.

[Pakhtunzai]

I am looking forward to this too

[Laila]

The next thing to do, which is why this thread was created, is to highlight what are those rights that a man and a woman has in Islam.

Mu'min, great start. I am yet to share a series about marriage, women, men and intimacy between them from an Islamic point of view. Something tells me it will be quite popular.

Keep it coming InshaAllah.

I am definitely looking forward to it

[MeemWawMeemNoon]

Before we move on, I wish to unfold the station of a man and a woman in the eyes of Allah. These verses have so many meanings. One could probably write books on each verse of the Holy Quran; however, for simplicity’s sake I will only focus on the equality of a man and a woman in the eyes of Allah for now. I have quoted all of the verses that I have used in the description below, just to make it easy to refer to.

The verses that I will be using for the post below.

7:189 It is He Who created you from a single person, and made his mate of like nature, in order that he might dwell with her (in love). When they are united, she bears a light burden and carries it about (unnoticed). When she grows heavy, they both pray to Allah their Lord, (saying): "If Thou givest us a goodly child, we vow we shall (ever) be grateful."

42:11 (He is) the Creator of the heavens and the earth: He has made for you pairs from among yourselves, and pairs among cattle: by this means does He multiply you: there is nothing whatever like unto Him, and He is the One that hears and sees (all things).

16:72 And Allah has made for you mates (and companions) of your own nature, and made for you, out of them, sons and daughters and grandchildren, and provided for you sustenance of the best: will they then believe in vain things, and be ungrateful for Allah.s favours?-

30:21 And among His Signs is this, that He created for you mates from among yourselves, that ye may dwell in tranquillity with them, and He has put love and mercy between your (hearts): verily in that are Signs for those who reflect

39:6 He created you (all) from a single person: then created, of like nature, his mate; and he sent down for you eight head of cattle in pairs: He makes you, in the wombs of your mothers, in stages, one after another, in three veils of darkness. such is Allah, your Lord and Cherisher: to Him belongs (all) dominion. There is no god but He: then how are ye turned away (from your true Centre)?

51:49 And of every thing We have created pairs: That ye may receive instruction.

78:8 And (have We not) created you in pairs[?],

[MeemWawMeemNoon]

The above verses show how much Islam is laying stress on the fact that a man is not better than a woman and a woman is not better than a man. The fact of the matter is that where نفس واحدةis mentioned clearly shows that Allah Jalla Shanuhu created mankind from a single soul. The real translation of this is “single soul” not “single person,” as Yusuf Ali has translated it. This then clarifies that a woman is not created from a man, but rather she is from the same species of man—having the same propensities, tendencies.

The above statement is proven by the fact that the Holy Quran has noted that from ourselves Allah has created mates for us and the He has made pairs for us out of ourselves. Therefore, one can only have one conclusion, that Allah Ta’ala gave man a partner for him from his own kind, i.e. human beings. So, the hadith that Allah created woman from the rib of man cannot be taken literally.

In view and in light of the Holy Quran it can only mean that Allah create a mate for man from his own kind. This view is further backed up by the Holy Quran from the following verses: 78:8 and 51:49. These verses indicate that Allah created everything in pairs. This is ample proof that Allah never intended the meaning that one is better than the other. These verses indicate that a man does not owe a woman anything nor does a woman owe a man anything, none of them are superior than the other in the eyes of Allah—they are both equal.

[MeemWawMeemNoon]

That is a beautiful idea. I will, Insha Allah, as we go along.

Right now, I am concentrating on the equality of men and women in the eyes of our Creator.

[spogmai shaglay]

i think this thread was lost... i am trying to revive it here....

let us just understand that Islam states equality for men and women.... its men who have used their rights to the fullest and have deprived women of their rights stated in Islam...

here i mean no offenses to men at all......

if u reflect and ponder you will realize how the rights of women are being violated by men in our society...
whatever man thought he could use for his benefit in being used and the things which he is required to abstain from is not being followed at all....

but for women its the other way round.... she is being deprived of her rights in the 1st place and whatever restrictions are mentioned for her are seriously taken into consideration by men......

Yes, there are restrictions for men as well..... but the restrictions for women are taken seriously by women and men as welll...but what about here rights?????????
is she being given all her rights....


this Quranic verse correctly states what the equality of men and women in Islam...

1. According to the Qur'an, men and women have the same spiritual human nature:

O mankind: Reverence your Guardian-Lord Who created you from a single person
created of like nature his mate and from them twain scattered (like seeds) countless men and women; reverence Allah through Whom you demand your mutual (rights) and
(reverence) the wombs (that bore you): for Allah ever watches over you. (Qur'an 4:1)

It is He who created you from a single person and made his mate of like nature in order that he might dwell with her (in love). When they are united she bears a light burden and carries it about (unnoticed). When she grows heavy they both pray to Allah their
Lord (saying): "If You give us a goodly child we vow we shall (ever) be grateful."(Qur'an 7:189)

(He is) the Creator of the heavens and the earth: He has made for you pairs from among yourselves and pairs among cattle: by this means does He multiply you: there is nothing whatever like unto Him and Her is the One that hears and sees (all things.) (Qur'an 42:11))

[spogmai shaglay]

2. Both genders are recipients of the "divine breath" since they are created with the
same human and spiritual nature (nafsin-waahidah):
But He fashioned him in due proportion and breathed into him something of His spirit.
And He gave you (the faculties of) hearing and sight and feeling (and understanding):
little thanks to you give (Qur'an 15:29)


i invite all my friends here to discuss this topic on the rights of women in Islam....

[Muslimah]

equality

"Say to the believing men that they should lower their gaze and guard their modesty......And say to the believing women that they should lower their gaze and guard their modesty; that they should not display their beauty and ornaments except what ordinarily appear thereof; that they should draw their veils over their bosoms...." (Quran 24:30,31).

Obviously it is not just the women to guard their modesty. The man is also asked to lower his gaze and be modest.

[33:35] The submitting men, the submitting women, the believing men, the believing women, the obedient men, the obedient women, the truthful men, the truthful women, the steadfast men, the steadfast women, the reverent men, the reverent women, the charitable men, the charitable women, the fasting men, the fasting women, the chaste men, the chaste women, and the men who commemorate GOD frequently, and the commemorating women; GOD has prepared for them forgiveness and a great recompense.

I would like to compare this to:
2 Now I commend you because you remember me in everything and maintain the traditions even as I delivered them to you. 3 But I want you to understand that the head of every man is Christ, the head of the woman is the man, and the head of Christ is God. 4 Every man who prays or prophesies with his head covered dishonors his head, 5 but every woman who prays or prophesies with her head uncovered dishonors her head—it is the same as if her head were shaven. 6 For if a woman will not be covered, then let her be shorn! But since it is disgraceful for a woman to be shorn or shaven, let her be covered. 7 For indeed a man ought not to cover his head, being the image and glory of God; but woman is the glory of man. 8 For man was not made from woman, but woman from man. (Bible: corinthians: 1:2-8)

When I compare these two, I see that in Christianity men are considered higher than women, and women are the property of man. It says that man was not made from a woman, but woman was made from a man. I disagree. It takes both a man and a woman to create - so they are leaving women out!
When I look at the quote from Quran, it repeats men and women over and over again. It gives us responsibility equally, and does not put one of us higher than the other. Men or woman we are both responsible to praise Allah swt equally.

[Roshina]

Speaking of men's being the head of the woman ... can anyone explain verse 4:34 of the Quran? 4:34 is rightly considered to be the most controversial, most convoluted verse in the history of Islam and the Quran.

I have been studying it for the past 5 years, and I still haven't made a solid conclusion about it. I want us to look at different interpretations and different translations of the verse, since it actually implies that man is the head of the woman. I want us to see how we justify the beating/hitting of women, oftentimes saying, "Oh, the man is allowed to beat his wife but only LIGHTLY! it's not like you can abuse her just like that!" etc.

Here are some of the translations of verse 4:34 (NOTE: Anything in parenthesis is the translator's explanation, understanding and is not necessarily a part of the original Arabic text.)

- Men are the {qawwam} of women, because Allah has given the one more than the other, and because they support them from their means. Therefore the righteous women are {qanitat}, and guard in the husband's absence what Allah would have them guard. As to those women on whose part ye fear {nushuz}, admonish them first, then refuse to share their beds, and finally {adriboo} them; but when they {ataa:} to you, then seek not against them means of annoyance: For Allah is Most High, great above you all. Source

(Note that in the above version, the original Arabic terms have been kept to show that it's these words that have been either mistranslated, misinterprets, or are still open to interpretation -- or are used to justify violence against or the inferiority of women.)

- Men are (meant to be righteous and kind) guardians of women because God has favored some more than others and because they (i.e. men) spend out of their wealth. (In their turn) righteous women are (meant to be) devoted and to guard what God has (willed to be) guarded even though out of sight (of the husband). As for those (women) on whose part you fear ill-will and nasty conduct, admonish them (first), (next) separate them in beds (and last) beat them. But if they obey you, then seek nothing against them. Behold, God is most high and great. Source

- Men shall take full care of women with the bounties which God has bestowed more abundantly on the former than on the latter, and with what they may spend out of their possessions. And the righteous women are the truly devout ones, who guard the intimacy which God has [ordained to be] guarded. And as for those women whose ill-will you have reason to fear, admonish them [first]; then leave them alone in bed; then beat them; and if thereupon they pay you heed, do not seek to harm them. Behold, God is indeed most high, great.” (Translator: Laleh Bakhtiar - female.)

- Men are the protectors and maintainers of women, because Allah has given the one more (strength) than the other, and because they support them from their means. Therefore the righteous women are devoutly obedient, and guard in (the husband's) absence what Allah would have them guard. As to those women on whose part ye fear disloyalty and ill-conduct, admonish them (first), (Next), refuse to share their beds, (And last) beat them (lightly); but if they return to obedience, seek not against them Means (of annoyance): For Allah is Most High, great (above you all). (Translator: Yusuf Ali)

- Men are in charge of women, because Allah hath made the one of them to excel the other, and because they spend of their property (for the support of women). So good women are the obedient, guarding in secret that which Allah hath guarded. As for those from whom ye fear rebellion, admonish them and banish them to beds apart, and scourge them. Then if they obey you, seek not a way against them. Lo! Allah is ever High, Exalted, Great. (Translator: Pickthal)

- Men are the maintainers of women because Allah has made some of them to excel others and because they spend out of their property; the good women are therefore obedient, guarding the unseen as Allah has guarded; and (as to) those on whose part you fear desertion, admonish them, and leave them alone in the sleeping-places and beat them; then if they obey you, do not seek a way against them; surely Allah is High, Great. (Translator: Shakir)

Source for the above three translations.

- Men are the support of women as God gives some more means than others, and because they spend of their wealth (to provide for them). So women who are virtuous are obedient to God and guard the hidden as God has guarded it. As for women you feel are averse, talk to them suasively; then leave them alone in bed (without molesting them) and go to bed with them (when they are willing). If they open out to you, do not seek an excuse for blaming them. Surely God is sublime and great. (Translator: Ahmed Ali)

More available at this link.

So, note how the term "nushooz" has been translated when it comes to women (disobedience, disloyalty, ill-conduct, etc.) ... EVEN though it literally means "to rise, to go above, to desert, give up" (see, for example, verse 58:11 of the Quran: "O you who believe! When you are told to make room in the assemblies, (spread out and) make room: (ample) room will Allah provide for you. And when you are told "inshuzoo" (to rise up), Allah will raise up to suitable ranks and degrees those of you who believe and who have been granted knowledge. Allah is well-acquainted with what you do.")

Annnnd guess what "nushooz" means when it comes to men, though. Somehow, it means "desertion" or "oppression"... as in, if the husband is being oppressive to his wife, or if he deserts her, etc. (I must say, beating your wife is oppressive. In which case verse :128 has a great suggestion for women who are being treated like that by their husbands.)

4:128 reads: "If a wife fears cruelty or nushooz on her husband's part, there is no blame on them if they arrange an amicable settlement between themselves; and such settlement is best, even though men's souls are swayed by greed. But if you do good and practice self-restraint, God is well-acquainted with what you do."

One must ask ... why the correct translation of the Arabic word "nushooz" when it comes to men and when it comes to the command/suggestion of giving up or yielding a position, but when it comes to women, it somehow magically means ill-conduct or disloyalty?

Yet, nothing in the Quran makes it obvious that the woman has to obey her husband. She's told, just like men are told, that she must be obedient to God, just as men are to be obedient to God. "Qaanit" doesn't necessarily mean obedience to man/husband: It's the same term used when God is saying that "obedient men and obedient women ... for them is reward promised by God."

Earlier scholars of Islam interpreter it to mean obedience of woman to her husband, clearly because women in most, if not all, societies are told to obey their husbands. It made sense to them, and we can't condemn them for having written volumes on the concept of obedience in Islam (of a woman to her husband).

But today, thankfully, scholars are re-evaluating the implications of verse 4:34 and are trying to figure out what exactly it means.

This link gives explanations of classical scholars, their commentary, on the same verse. It's really interesting how the author writes at the end, "Therefore, due to all of the statements and interpretations of the word “nushooz”, one can objectively state that nushooz includes the refusal of a woman to answer the husband’s call to her bed."

I'm like, ummm... okay, but this isn't from God; it's from men, humans. Why should their views be binding?

Anyway, just a little wonder. While the Quran doesn't make it obvious that man is the head of the woman, humans' translations and interpretations do; read commentaries of EVERY Quranic verse that pertains to women, and you'll see what the woman is viewed as. Woman meaning wife, of course, since mothers are always giving a sublime position.