Family?

[Zayam]

This may sound like an attack, and I am sorry, but when I joined this forum I was told that I am family. As my personal life is falling apart around me, and I am being prepared to be on my own, I thought "well at least I have my Pashtun family online". Now I wonder what family means to you, because I feel like all the doors are closing on me, here at least. Maybe Allah wants me to be very much alone. OK.....

[Fahd]

sorry if u hurt
hope u feel better inshallah

i am here , i will be a bro


hmmm do u listen to music ??
i can tell u the bigest prob is the music
it's playing on ur feelings make u feel alon even if u not !!
just leave the music for 3 dyas and listen to quran in this three days !!
even u set on net don't listen to music in this three days

i will ask you in friday how u feel , im sure 200% u wont feel alone

[kandahari ella]

Aww Zayam are you alright? What's going on? Please feel free to PM me anytime you like. Heck you can even call me if you want! =) Hope everything gets better love.

[Dreamer]

inshallah things will get better

[Master Khan]

Well I am mostly Alone anyway in this Country lol,
But if you are board and you wanna talk then we are all here wrora.
when I am board I just came here and speak to my brothers and sisters here

[Sheenka]

This may sound like an attack, and I am sorry, but when I joined this forum I was told that I am family. As my personal life is falling apart around me, and I am being prepared to be on my own, I thought "well at least I have my Pashtun family online". Now I wonder what family means to you, because I feel like all the doors are closing on me, here at least. Maybe Allah wants me to be very much alone. OK.....

this is how our pashtun families are unfortuantely

[IamDZJ]

zayam, talk is very very cheap. i roll my eyes every time i read "welcome to the family.." crap. there are certain members in here who address others as five year olds. sweet talk is good when you want to be nice and gullible but insulting when it's overdone.
last but not least, come here and enjoy the time you spend here with us if possible but for your own sake, don't keep expectations from others. you have your own dear self and that is all you should need to go by.

[Manzareh]

Zayam i dont no u, but this is a touching thread. im here for you as a brother would.

[Laila]

I remember when i first started the whole PF family thing.....I was hoping it wouldnt turn out as an exaggeration but anyways......i do get PMs from people for advice and such, and i do the best i can as a member, and a sister to anyone.

Zayam, my door is always open. You and I always have good discussion, so please, dont feel as if you cant count on me. I am here And that goes for anyone else.......the best i can do is a helping hand.

[Zayam]

sorry if u hurt
hope u feel better inshallah

i am here , i will be a bro


hmmm do u listen to music ??
i can tell u the biggest prob is the music
it's playing on ur feelings make u feel alon even if u not !!
just leave the music for 3 days and listen to quran in this three days !!
even u set on net don't listen to music in this three days

i will ask you in friday how u feel , im sure 200% u wont feel alone

Hey Bro-

I like to listen to music, and I know what you mean, but I rarely listen to music that depresses me any more, as I am used to that kind of effect. So sometimes I listen to Spiritual music or joyous music, but that soothes, rather than depresses.

Memories are what get me down, and I know past is past, but understanding why things happened in a certain why, and what I can do differently next time, is one habit of mine. I can not see the other person's heart-only Allah can do that. In order for me to be peaceful about something, I need to understand the whys...

Zayam

[sahil112]

Hey Bro-

I like to listen to music, and I know what you mean, but I rarely listen to music that depresses me any more, as I am used to that kind of effect. So sometimes I listen to Spiritual music or joyous music, but that soothes, rather than depresses.

Memories are what get me down, and I know past is past, but understanding why things happened in a certain why, and what I can do differently next time, is one habit of mine. I can not see the other person's heart-only Allah can do that. In order for me to be peaceful about something, I need to understand the whys...

Zayam

you need mellow music man um i kinda get where your coming from bruv but in life there are alwys going to be things which we wont have an explanation for, thingz will happen which we didnt expect to, lose people for various reasons unexpectedly but that never means you pouse life and wonder about why such thingz happened becouse end of the day its life and ****ing **** happenz so jus move da fuk on. sorry if i sound harsh just the way i approah things like this...
and listin 2 dis song : bob marley redemption song

[Gulalai]

Salam Zayam,

I know exactly how you feel!! I wanted to make a similar thread about how i was told PF is a family.. but it doesn't feel so much like a family. I know how one might see it as a family, but when someone tells you "its like a family here" then you automatically think that you will be loved and cared for around here, heard and respected. Not judged or ignored, or even feel insignificant. I took a break from PF because every thread i entered there was always someone attacking someone else. I didn't feel safe speaking my mind because i felt like so many people were going to start attacking me. I obviously don't care if someone disagrees with me, but they should state their opinions with respect. Fahd wanted me to make a thread about this, but i didn't want to because i know every one was going to respond like "ooh I'm sorry you feel that way" "I'm still here for you" "don't think that everyone is that way" etc.. all sympathetic. But i already know who is here for me, and i already know that not everyone is that way.. but that's not the point. The point is that: this is my opinion of what has been going on, this is the way I feel, and why do we have to debate every single thing? Why isn't it enough if i just believe what ever i believe -__-
I don't even care anymore lol... I'm just going to say what ever i feel and only explain my reasoning if i feel like it (:

Anyways, back to your post Zayam. This is the first time we have ever spoken, but i am here if you ever need just someone to hear you out. And i am not saying it just out of sympathy.
Honestly I'm here for any one on PF.. if they need advise, or just to let it all out lol i'm all ears. and i'll try to help out the best i can!

[Ashiq]

The comfort of my soul, the joy of my eyes, the happiness of my tears, the contentment of my heart, I find in my Creator. I could never depend on human beings: every human being has their own problems and they themselves are dependent.

What makes me happy is when I think of my Muhammad (may the peace and blessings of Allah, the Almighty, be upon him, his family, and his companions). He is the joy of my being.

Life is a journey, my friend, we all seek the shade of a tree to find comfort from the burnings of our griefs. Just be patient and know that this is just a phase. Remember that Allah puts those who seek Him through a lot of trials.

There was a man who had a hard life, everyday he would go through a lot of problems. He used to bear everything with patience. One day his routine became abnormal, things started to smooth out, his day went by without any problems or troubles, he looked up to the Heavens and said: You forgot me today?

[Catya Sher]

^ I'm not sure I like the last line - for I would rather have heard that the pressure let up.
But the rest of the post was beautiful and eloquent. I like about the shade of the [I picture a palm or eucalyptus] tree.

Another attempt at consolation is the story I always try to remind myself and everyone of the holy man bitten by a tiger.

The holy man thanked Allah, saying "Thank God, I fell into a CALAMITY. Rather than into sin."

It's an ancient Islamic spiritual perspective quite antithetical to mainstream American thought.

Hence it's best never to listen to the average person around these days. Stick with sound Truths instead.

Gulalai: You seem too nice for anyone to be mean to you. I'm surprised. Sorry that you felt like that.

[eyeliner]

I hope you read this because i actually spent time posting it, lol.

I truly understand how you feel. We all go through times in our lifes that make us feel negative but in the end of the day we have to understand that people can only say so much to us, to make us feel better....people can tell you.....they know how you feel....but they dont know how you feel...its only when someone goes through the same thing do they understand the extent. People on PF go on about how we are an online family---at first i found it hospitable but it kind of makes me cringe now...we may be an online family.....but in reality were all alone. Sorry if any of this sounds brute or shallow.....but thats the way it is. In the end of the day Allah doesnt burden a soul with more then it can bear......and at times we may find that hard to believe but its true. If you feel alone you should do dhikr because only in the rememberance of Allah do hearts find rest. I know you can't see anyones heart or intentions...but thats how it is unfortunutely. Life has its ups and downs.....so i guess we have to find some way to deal with it effectively. But hey Zayam if you ever need a shoulder.......you can always talk to me........i would be more then delighted. May Allah help you and everyone else threw the trials and tribulations that we face. All we can really do is make dua for everyone.

I leave you with this eloquent quote......
in the words of marilyn monroe-- "I believe that everything happens for a reason. People change so that you can learn to let go, things go wrong so that you appreciate them when they're right, you believe lies so you eventually learn to trust no one but yourself, and sometimes good things fall apart so better things can fall together."