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  • Relatives oh Relatives

    So I'm sure, we all have those annoying relatives that we desperately want to stay away from at every event. Well since Eid was during the week, I get to see these fabulous people this weekend. Joy oh Joy! The studying excuse always works, but now that I can postpone studying for a bit, I have to see them.

    Yup- now I must succumb to figuring out different ways of avoiding them. What do you guys usually do with relatives that you don't particularly get along with?
    "Do not lose hope in adversity and complain that God singled you out for punishment, remitting others guilty of worse sins. Your present state could very well be His intent to elevate your spiritual station. Or He could just be testing your faith. Everyday that you persevere, you grow closer to perfection. Thus, your present despair may be the beginning of an infinite blessing". - Shaykh Abdul Qadir Jilani.

  • #2
    Well, I wish I was back with my family. So maybe you should try to just enjoy it I guess. Maybe, find out from them what everyone else has been up to. I know what you mean. They want to know every single event that is happening in your life, then they flatter, and they repeat themselves maybe a 100 times in the process!

    Find one relative (a girl or guy cousin) and say hey you want to hand out at a mall or some city.

    But its nice to be surrounded by family sometimes!!!

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    • #3
      i dont want any of my relative around me lolz

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      • #4
        Originally posted by kandahari ella View Post
        So I'm sure, we all have those annoying relatives that we desperately want to stay away from at every event. Well since Eid was during the week, I get to see these fabulous people this weekend. Joy oh Joy! The studying excuse always works, but now that I can postpone studying for a bit, I have to see them.

        Yup- now I must succumb to figuring out different ways of avoiding them. What do you guys usually do with relatives that you don't particularly get along with?
        dont go to their house and when they come to ur house dont talk much with them, trust me it works

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        • #5
          I am overall very happy with my family. I just met a few relatives of my fathers who we never knew here.....and they are really cool. Love them now.
          However, i do have an aunt that just makes me cringe my teeth. Though she is back in Afghanistan. At first she was really cool and nice, but then she did some messed up things directed at me......so i just avoid her.

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          • #6
            we have a similar annoying aunt (who isn't really a blood relative - but close to the family) and she always says really backward things. My mum always gives me a look of 'dont say anything - just leave it' ... not easy sometimes ...

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            • #7
              Originally posted by Rukhsana View Post
              we have a similar annoying aunt (who isn't really a blood relative - but close to the family) and she always says really backward things. My mum always gives me a look of 'dont say anything - just leave it' ... not easy sometimes ...
              Its always an aunt huh lol :D

              yeah there is always a lady in the circle that just makes you wanna do this >>>> then this>>> then this>>>>

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              • #8
                Play it cool - take a deep breath. I know how it is for Kandaharis but what I can suggest you is try reading a book or something. After your done with your super long rogh bar(singaya sha ya, jor ya, pa khair ya, plankay de sha dey....")kindly excuse yourself, although I am aware how difficult that can be. Look, I am at least trying to help you, do I get partial credit at least?
                Even Adobe Photoshop can't change me.

                A line[Durrand line] of hatred that raised a wall between the two brothers -Hamid Karzai

                For generations, the Hindus of India prayed for deliverance from "the venom of the cobra, the teeth of the tiger and the vengeance of the Afghan."


                The men of Kábul and Khilj also went home; and whenever they were questioned about the Musulmáns of the Kohistán (the mountains), and how matters stood there, they said, "Don't call it Kohistán, but Afghánistán; for there is nothing there but Afgháns and disturbances." Thus it is clear that for this reason the people of the country call their home in their own language Afghánistán, and themselves Afgháns. The people of India call them Patán; but the reason for this is not known. But it occurs to me, that when, under the rule of Muhammadan sovereigns, Musulmáns first came to the city of Patná, and dwelt there, the people of India (for that reason) called them Patáns—but God knows!

                -Ferishta, 1560–1620

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                • #9
                  Haha. Admin Khan- yes you shall get partial credit for helping me out. Thanks everyone for your advice. I love them, but their a little challenging to handle at times. The last thing, I want to do is ignore them or make them feel un-welcomed. I feel that all reflects on the type of individuals my parents are. I don't want anyone saying that my parents didn't raise me properly. So I'll sit there and be nice, but I can't be that "fake" nice. That's one skill I'd love to learn, on how to be very "fake" nice. Sadly, I can't find anything, my facial reactions tell all. =)

                  But all in all- it was a great day with the fam bam. =)
                  "Do not lose hope in adversity and complain that God singled you out for punishment, remitting others guilty of worse sins. Your present state could very well be His intent to elevate your spiritual station. Or He could just be testing your faith. Everyday that you persevere, you grow closer to perfection. Thus, your present despair may be the beginning of an infinite blessing". - Shaykh Abdul Qadir Jilani.

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                  • #10
                    do what I do. Listen to what they say but don't let it hit your nerves.

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                    • #11
                      Originally posted by Swat
                      just tolerate it. My wifes family drive me insane but I keep on smiling.
                      how many wives u have?

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                      • #12
                        Eh. Smile in their faces, when they're trying to provoke you, just smile. Someone else will feel bad for you and defend you or speak on your behalf, and that person is gonna look like an ass. And you'll look wonderful because you didn't do besharmi and talked back to an elder.
                        And if you have to answer, just say nice stuff in return, be all cute and sweet. Like if they criticize you, be like, "Oh pray that I get better". If they ridicule you, be like, "hehe you're right." And then join them in pointing out your own flaws.
                        But in general, just avoid them.

                        It's wonderful because it works every time.

                        Daa zma lewanay Zrra gorah, daa sta lewanee Mina..
                        Za ba da Sahra warnakam da Iran pa Golestan,
                        Dalta za yao & yakta yam, halta zar zma pa Shaan
                        .

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                        • #13
                          ^ you are lucky you still have grandparents......i dont :/

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                          • #14
                            I love my grandma to death[/B] she's the only grandparent that I have left. So I will sit there for hours just to talk to her. Masha'Allah she's on extraordinary woman. As for the others, mayana, you're right I'm going to follow your theory each and every time. =)
                            "Do not lose hope in adversity and complain that God singled you out for punishment, remitting others guilty of worse sins. Your present state could very well be His intent to elevate your spiritual station. Or He could just be testing your faith. Everyday that you persevere, you grow closer to perfection. Thus, your present despair may be the beginning of an infinite blessing". - Shaykh Abdul Qadir Jilani.

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                            • #15
                              I'm not a besharma- I'm honestly the sweetest person you'll EVER meet. Unless, you cross that line then its down the hill for you. I'll forgive, but I won't forget. And honestly, it comes down to people being shady with my parents. I don't feel the need to respect anyone or tolerate anything they say, when their disrespecting my parents, and my grandparent. So yes, as hard as I try to be a the fake little kid with them. I can't. I can't even be in the same room with them. Sorry- for my rant and thanks for the advice everyone! =)
                              "Do not lose hope in adversity and complain that God singled you out for punishment, remitting others guilty of worse sins. Your present state could very well be His intent to elevate your spiritual station. Or He could just be testing your faith. Everyday that you persevere, you grow closer to perfection. Thus, your present despair may be the beginning of an infinite blessing". - Shaykh Abdul Qadir Jilani.

                              Comment

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