'Ghagh': The Pashtun Custom of Men Forcing Marriage Proposals on Women

[Michin Khel]

Ghagh involves a man firing a gun into the air at the doorstep of a girl's house and shouting her name to inform her family that she can only be married to him. It is on decline but it persists in FATA and underdeveloped southern districts of Khyber Pakhtunkhwa.

The Khyber Pakhtunkhwa Elimination of Custom of Ghag Bill 2012 was passed unanimously to eradicate the social evil called ghag. The law defines ghag as “A custom, usage, tradition or practice whereby a person forcibly demands or claims the hand of a woman, without her own or her parents’ or wali’s will and free consent, by making an open declaration either by words spoken or written or by visible representation or by an imputation, innuendo, or insinuation, directly or indirectly, in a locality or before public in general that the woman shall stand engaged to him or any other particular man and that no other man shall make a marriage proposal to her or marry her, threatening her parents and other relatives to refrain from giving her hand in marriage to any other person, and shall also include obstructing the marriage of such woman in any other manner pursuant to such declaration.”

The violators can be punished or imprisoned for up to seven years and not less than three years or be liable to a fine of Rs0.5 million or both. The bill ordains offences under this act shall be tried by the court of sessions established under the code.

[Diaphanous]

This is wrong. Alas, the men don't care. Because this is such a male dominated society, with no regard to women, it is against Islam. Our culture gives no recognition nor does it ask any opinions of thier wives, mothers, sisters or daughter. To the Pashtun men, woman are the same as the furniture in thier homes, the crops on thier farms and the clothes on thier back. Women, wives, sisters, daughter and mothers are nothing but a burden and property for them.

Now back to the question, in islam, both the man and the woman are suposed to be asked if they accept the marriage to one another. If the girl says no, then it shouldn't be done. But muslims have forgotten the teachings of the Prophet(s.a.w), instead they force the marriage upon the girl. and to a man that could be old enough to be her father or even her grandfather. She is then forced to be nothing but an item of pleasure and childbearing for him. Nothing but a thing he uses to his pleasure and a womb to carry his children. This is not true Islam. We need to forget about these inhumane traditions and focus on islamic traditions.

[Badlun]

This is wrong. Alas, the men don't care. Because this is such a male dominated society, with no regard to women, it is against Islam. Our culture gives no recognition nor does it ask any opinions of thier wives, mothers, sisters or daughter. To the Pashtun men, woman are the same as the furniture in thier homes, the crops on thier farms and the clothes on thier back. Women, wives, sisters, daughter and mothers are nothing but a burden and property for them.

Now back to the question, in islam, both the man and the woman are suposed to be asked if they accept the marriage to one another. If the girl says no, then it shouldn't be done. But muslims have forgotten the teachings of the Prophet(s.a.w), instead they force the marriage upon the girl. and to a man that could be old enough to be her father or even her grandfather. She is then forced to be nothing but an item of pleasure and childbearing for him. Nothing but a thing he uses to his pleasure and a womb to carry his children. This is not true Islam. We need to forget about these inhumane traditions and focus on islamic traditions.

I agree with the cultural part but how in Islam you can ask a girl yes or no if she does not know the man who will be her life partner. This man is not muharam till Nikah, and as such she cannot see him, she cannot talk to him, she cannot meet him and cannot pass not a single second with him.

The best way is first a boy friend/girl friend relation and then you go for a formal marriage if it is really necessary.

[Badlun]

The Khyber Pakhtunkhwa Elimination of Custom of Ghag Bill 2012 is a good step but it is an incomplete law as how can you involve her parents’ or wali’s will in the decision of the fate of a woman. How parents with generation gap and how a wali can decide the life's most important thing for another person.

[Admin Khan]

This is wrong. Alas, the men don't care. Because this is such a male dominated society, with no regard to women, it is against Islam. Our culture gives no recognition nor does it ask any opinions of thier wives, mothers, sisters or daughter. To the Pashtun men, woman are the same as the furniture in thier homes, the crops on thier farms and the clothes on thier back. Women, wives, sisters, daughter and mothers are nothing but a burden and property for them.

Now back to the question, in islam, both the man and the woman are suposed to be asked if they accept the marriage to one another. If the girl says no, then it shouldn't be done. But muslims have forgotten the teachings of the Prophet(s.a.w), instead they force the marriage upon the girl. and to a man that could be old enough to be her father or even her grandfather. She is then forced to be nothing but an item of pleasure and childbearing for him. Nothing but a thing he uses to his pleasure and a womb to carry his children. This is not true Islam. We need to forget about these inhumane traditions and focus on islamic traditions.

I don't think it's fair to generalize; I agree there are problems, exposing them are part of the solution, but labeling them all as the problem will result in no one to fix it. Think about that, aside from that, your head is in the right place; hopefully you aren't offended.

[Admin Khan]

The Khyber Pakhtunkhwa Elimination of Custom of Ghag Bill 2012 is a good step but it is an incomplete law as how can you involve her parents’ or wali’s will in the decision of the fate of a woman. How parents with generation gap and how a wali can decide the life's most important thing for another person.

I think there are various opinions on that, Badlun. Parents opinion is important cause they are more experienced, but I agree, they shouldn't *FORCE* their opinion.

[ډګروال]

never heard of this "Pashtun custom".
if you do that in AFG you might land up in trouble.

[khushal]

The Khyber Pakhtunkhwa Elimination of Custom of Ghag Bill 2012 is a good step but it is an incomplete law as how can you involve her parents’ or wali’s will in the decision of the fate of a woman. How parents with generation gap and how a wali can decide the life's most important thing for another person.

Ghula,
There is no wali in the marriage ceremony. There is a wakeel.

[khushal]

This is not a Pashtun custom. This is regarded as one using force to get his way. Pashtunwali does not promote such practice. people that do this are regarded as kabarjun and maghror.

[Diaphanous]

I agree with the cultural part but how in Islam you can ask a girl yes or no if she does not know the man who will be her life partner. This man is not muharam till Nikah, and as such she cannot see him, she cannot talk to him, she cannot meet him and cannot pass not a single second with him.

The best way is first a boy friend/girl friend relation and then you go for a formal marriage if it is really necessary.

Actually, in Islam, it is allowed to sit with the groom in question if there is someone else present. You can also ask other people what this person is like, his personality and his habits. If you have forgotten, the Prophet(s.a.w) was proposed to by Khadija (R.A). She had seen him before and asked other people what he was like. She then went ahead with the marriage proposal.
In Islam, girlfriend/boyfriend relationships are haram, because a man that is not related to you by immediate blood, is mahram. so how can you have a girl/boyfriend? And what do you mean if it is necessary? Do you not believe in marriage, in nikkah?