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Hospitality - The Pashtun way
Pukhtoon have been described as one of the most hospitable peoples of the world. They consider Melmastiya or generous hospitality as one of the finest virtues and greet their guest warmly with a broad smile on their faces. A Pukhtoon feels delighted to receive a guest regardless of his past relations or acquaintance and prepares a delicious meal for him. “Each house,” says Mirza Agha Abbas of Shiraz, “subscribes a vessel of water for the mosque and for strangers”.
Dilating on the subject Mr. L. White King says that “Pathans regard dispensing of hospitality as a sacred duty, and supply their guests with food according to their means”. Guests are usually entertained in a Hujra (village meeting place), where guests are entertained and routine meetings of the elders are held. Each village contains at least, one Hujra. The host kills a fowl if he cannot afford to slaughter a lamb or goat and prepares a sweet dish (Halwa) to satisfy his sense of hospitality. Guests are not only looked after but also respected. “A rich chief”, says T.L. Penall, “will be satisfied with nothing less than the slaying of the sheep when he receives a guest of distinction. A poorer man will be satisfied with the slaying of a fowl”.
Pukhtoons feel happy over the coming of the guests and greet them with traditional slogans, “Har Kala Rasha” and “Pa Khair Raghley” and “Starrey Mashey” i.e. may you often come, welcome and may you not be tired. He also exchanges such courtesies with the guest as “Jorr Yai” (are you well) “Kha Jorr Yai” (are you quite well) and “Takrra Yai” (are you hale and hearty). The guest gratefully acknowledging these forms of welcome by saying “Pa Khair Ossey”, (may you be safe) “Khudai de mal sha” (May God be with you) “Khushal Ossey” (may you be prosperous and happy) and “Ma Khwaraigey” (may you not be destitute). This way of greeting full of friendly gestures reflects the warmth with which the guests are received. The arrival of the guest in Hujra is immediately followed by tea and later the guest is served with a rich meal consisting of Halwa (a special sweet dish), Pullao (rice dish) and other seasonal dishes. When the guest sets off on his journey he is bade farewell in these words “Pa Makha De Kha” (may your journey be safe and happy).
The guest of an individual is considered as the guest of all and he is jointly entertained by the villagers in the Hujra. A variety of dishes are prepared and the elders of the family lunch or dine with the guest on a common piece of cloth (Dastarkhwan) spread over a carpet, drugget or a mazri mat. It is one of the cardinal principles of Pukhtoon’s hospitality to request the guest to sup or take a few morsels with the village folk even though the guest may have had his meals but the etiquette enjoins upon the guest to oblige his hosts by taking a few more morsels. After they have partaken of a meal the company prays to Allah to give the host riches and prosperity and power of entertaining more guests.
Giving a vivid description of Pukhtoon hospitality, Sir Olaf Caroe writes “The giving of hospitality to the guest is a national point of honour, so much so that the reproach to an inhospitable man is that he is devoid of Pakhto, a creature of contempt. It is the greatest of affronts to a Pathan to carry off his guest, and his indignation will be directed not against the guest who quits him but to the person who prevails on him to leave. This, or something like it, was the reception accorded to the outlaws from British justice who fled to the hills.”
Another example of Pukhtoon hospitality is recorded by Dr. Pennel who served in Bannu and the adjoining tribal areas as a missionary doctor for a number of years. He writes “on one occasion I came to a village with my companion rather late in the evening. The chief himself was away but his son received me with every mark of respect and killed a fowl and cooked a savoury Pullao”. He adds, “Late at night when the Khan returned and found on enquiry that the Bannu Padre Sahib was his guest, he asked if he had been suitably entertained. To his dismay he heard that only a chicken had been prepared for dinner. Immediately, therefore, he ordered a sheep to be killed and cooked, so that his honour might be saved.” To their minds, Says another English writer, “hospitality is the finest of virtues. Any person who can make his way into their dwellings will not only be safe, but will be kindly received.”
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