Pashtuns and marriage

[Michin Khel]

^ I agree with above facts

[Muslimah]

And I also know that men - no matter what their culture or religion, there are the odd ones who hit their wives because they feel empowered by doing so. I also feel that a lot of times the woman makes them so angry that they provoke the man to be so angry - and when men are angry, it is natural for them to be physical.

In the same respect, men sometimes provoke a woman to get so mad, but what do we do? We cry like big babies!

[Feroza_Banu]

^r u justifying physical abuse that women face? u r saying it is ok for a man to hit a woman because most likely the woman has done something to deserve the beating? so u r directly blaming women for getting beat up?

if u can justify this then u can also justify all other kinds of abuse... well the WHITE man had to kill the BLACK man because he must have done something to provoke the innocent WHITE man... he was just angry... and acting out of anger.... right?

[Feroza_Banu]

^lollll.. good for you...

or u can just call me, i would beat him up too for you

*flexes muscles*

[Shayesta]

now if u want a story of pashtoon man marrying a girl out of race its another story. sad but pashtoon men marries a tajik or out of race and suddenly he treats her with utter respect and love... i have seen that happen alot!

This is something which pisses me off so bad! The reason for this also stupidity of most of our women. Not all Tajik women are educated either but they KNOW how to keep their men under their fists and they haven't been taught to tolerate all kind of mistreatment and crap from their husbands. Even a man can respect a woman IF she respects herself, but I have seen huge number of Pukhtana's telling their daughters to just endure crime, just endure injustice and keep their husbands happy no matter what. In my eyes, such women don't respect themselves so why should their husbands respect them? They just cry when their husbands beat them up and teach their daughters to do the same, so why should the husband stop beating her up? They tell their daughters to kill themselves if husband is unhappy but never part, so why should husbands even think about what she is going through as she herself closed all options for herself?

Even Tajiks are as poor as Pukhtoons and a lot of them are uneducated as well, but when I was in village of Laghman with majority Tajiks, I have seen the difference in which Pukhtoons and Tajiks raise their kids. Pukhtoons have learnt to just keep their mouth shut and be used like a donkey, while Tajiks will reply back at you if you say something which makes them unhappy. Pukhtoons think it's utter disgrace to report any harass, while I have seen how very poor Tajik households report to the police if injustice is done upon their daughters. This is our, women's, fault. We shouldn't be proud of the fact we are oh so strong that we can endure all kind of injustice, we should only be proud when we teach our daughters the right way to live. We should be proud to live a short but respectful life and a life with head up, instead of a long life where you daily will be threatened to get killed and where you daily get insulted. We should be proud when mothers-in-law (who surely have been beaten up at their turn as well) stick up for their daughters-in-law because as far as I have seen, 90% of the time when a man beats his wife is because of his mother talking sh*t about his wife. Sometimes mothers-in-law even join in!

[Feroza_Banu]

This is something which pisses me off so bad! The reason for this also stupidity of most of our women. Not all Tajik women are educated either but they KNOW how to keep their men under their fists and they haven't been taught to tolerate all kind of mistreatment and crap from their husbands. Even a man can respect a woman IF she respects herself, but I have seen huge number of Pukhtana's telling their daughters to just endure crime, just endure injustice and keep their husbands happy no matter what. In my eyes, such women don't respect themselves so why should their husbands respect them? They just cry when their husbands beat them up and teach their daughters to do the same, so why should the husband stop beating her up? They tell their daughters to kill themselves if husband is unhappy but never part, so why should husbands even think about what she is going through as she herself closed all options for herself?

Even Tajiks are as poor as Pukhtoons and a lot of them are uneducated as well, but when I was in village of Laghman with majority Tajiks, I have seen the difference in which Pukhtoons and Tajiks raise their kids. Pukhtoons have learnt to just keep their mouth shut and be used like a donkey, while Tajiks will reply back at you if you say something which makes them unhappy. Pukhtoons think it's utter disgrace to report any harass, while I have seen how very poor Tajik households report to the police if injustice is done upon their daughters. This is our, women's, fault. We shouldn't be proud of the fact we are oh so strong that we can endure all kind of injustice, we should only be proud when we teach our daughters the right way to live. When mothers-in-law (who surely have been beaten up at their turn as well) stick up for their daughters-in-law because as far as I have seen, 90% of the time when a man beats his wife is because of his mother talking sh*t about his wife. Sometimes mothers-in-law even join in!

oh my Goodness... i think u are the first person who understand those lines... am i dreaming? oh wow... yes this is exactly what i was referring to... i couldn't agree with you more... i agree with every line every word you wrote... ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh i am so relieved at least we have one person like you, who has the ability to read between the lines... i didn't have to write a whole paragraph for you to understand my point, and this is exactly what you did... u understood all that i wanted to write and wrote it... thank u ... thank u.

[Shayesta]

^ LOL, I am glad I made your day sweety! :D

And we have been agreeing on many things before as well and even before you told me I am the first person ever you agree with on every single word, remember me? Just guess. :P

[Feroza_Banu]

^ LOL, I am glad I made your day sweety! :D

And we have been agreeing on many things before as well and even before you told me I am the first person ever you agree with on every single word, remember me? Just guess. :P

oh so that means i know you? oh wow! how cool..

hmmmmmmmmmmmm... i have a bad memory... but u give me a vibe that i am familiar with... tell me tell me... who... i can't wait to know.

edit: Msz. ? orrrrrrrrr... Turschak?

[Shayesta]

^ LOL, bingo! Misz iz da name! :P

Now let's not flood this topic any more and I shall now ask you on your profile how you have been. :D

[Iqra]

Wise words.

Now to put it in action!

I know some of my heroes have already

Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee its you!!! :O mubarak!

[Shayesta]

^ Whom you talking to dear? And what are you trying to say? :O

[Iqra]

To myself, peroza, and you.

And what I am saying is a secret.

[Shayesta]

^ Oeh, I love secrets! May I and Peroza flease know THE secret as well? :$

(Am I actually plooding again?)