Marriage to non-Pashtuns

[Dreamer]

Dear Qrattugai, to say that someone does not like Pashtun marriages to any other ethnicities, where does the racism comes in.
If Dreamer or anyone else is liberal, secular, athesiast, open minded, and many names can be given to such type of philosophy, but it does not mean that he should preach the people in this forum, whom one should marry.
This thread was aimed to have the opinion of Pashtoons in the forums, if they want or donot want the pashtun marriages to other ethnicities and why?
I think many people discussed well both the ways, but just to blame with racism someone, as many in this forum are nationalist and by blaming, insulting, and abusing Pashtun nationalism is insulting the secular parties and ideology of pashtun nationalism and our heroes. Dreamer should be banned for the language and abusing smeone as a racist. If someone accept himself as a racist then k, otherwise this blame game will tensify the forum and it is not a good approach to impose one philosophy on the forum.
If this forum was aimed to preach the validity of cross ethnic marriages, then it is not good, but if it was aimed at discussing the bad and good side of the cross marriages, then was nice, and I as a member of this forum enjoyed it.
Hope you or any other moderator will consider my words.
Dont hear how loud someone is crying, i think look who commit the crime.

was I preaching???? i said its ok for pashtuns 2 marry out I wasnt telling ppl 2 go ahead... then two neolithical mind set members came on here ranting and raving that they wanted 2 preserve their race... Like I was forcing ppl 2 marry out.... Thats why i keep saying read my posts.... a thread like this was bound to cause arguments

[Laila]

Please, can we stop this! End it right here, and right now. This is pashtunforums, not childrenforum. This site is in public view, and how do you think these post will make us look like.

So please, i am asking kindly, as a member, please just stop with the name calling and derailing the thread. If you have nothing nice to say, its best to not say it.

Please consider this the last post of what is going on here....after this post, please go back to topic, and enough with the name calling.

Thank you.

[PFgulalai]

FINALLY someone is talking sense.
I challenge anyone to point out my single post on this thread where I have stopped someone from doing something, used offensive and abusive remarks, acted as a racist, or something else. I don't need someone's sympathy or help, but I want to know PF's take on it. Someone is openly abusing members here by using words as BARKING and RETARD and nobody is taking action. Really surprising to me!

Dear Qrattugai, to say that someone does not like Pashtun marriages to any other ethnicities, where does the racism comes in.
If Dreamer or anyone else is liberal, secular, athesiast, open minded, and many names can be given to such type of philosophy, but it does not mean that he should preach the people in this forum, whom one should marry.
This thread was aimed to have the opinion of Pashtoons in the forums, if they want or donot want the pashtun marriages to other ethnicities and why?
I think many people discussed well both the ways, but just to blame with racism someone, as many in this forum are nationalist and by blaming, insulting, and abusing Pashtun nationalism is insulting the secular parties and ideology of pashtun nationalism and our heroes. Dreamer should be banned for the language and abusing smeone as a racist. If someone accept himself as a racist then k, otherwise this blame game will tensify the forum and it is not a good approach to impose one philosophy on the forum.
If this forum was aimed to preach the validity of cross ethnic marriages, then it is not good, but if it was aimed at discussing the bad and good side of the cross marriages, then was nice, and I as a member of this forum enjoyed it.
Hope you or any other moderator will consider my words.
Dont hear how loud someone is crying, i think look who commit the crime.

[Roshina]

Dear Qrattugai, to say that someone does not like Pashtun marriages to any other ethnicities, where does the racism comes in.

I never agreed that it's racism. If you read my posts here, I said that I myself would not marry a non-Pukhtun, and I gave my reasons.

If someone believes that I'm being racist for not willing to marry a non-Pukhtun, that's not for me to deal with; that's their opinion, that's their idea of racism, and I disagree with it strongly. Why should I let it bother me? It won't change my own decision.

[Dreamer]

get over urself love... if u cant take it dnt give...

[Palwasha]

Thank you Laila Jaan.

Someone is openly abusing members here by using words as BARKING and RETARD and nobody is taking action. Really surprising to me!

Action is always taken on PF, the moderators take the role very seriously, khorey. Always voice your concerns directly to us, so we can deal with it promptly, InshAllah, as we try to do.

[Roshina]

Thanks for the enlightment Qrratugai
Quick question: What's the PF take on person who badmouths?just curious...

You report the post where someone has badmouthed you or someone else, and the moderators discuss it amongst themselves to decide together what to do about it. We ALWAYS, however, send a warning message to the person who badmouths, and depending on its severity, the person gets an infraction. Anyone who gets three infractions gets banned, if the infractions don't expire.

So, the best I can say to you is to just report any post you consider offensive, insulting, abusive, etc., and I assure you it'll be taken care of, and you will be informed about it. If nothing else, just contact a moderator and express your thoughts to her/him.

[Dreamer]

I was barked at.... i dnt take kindly 2 some loser telling me what is right 4 a pashtun 2 do... I mearly stated and I will say it again for the member with low IQ that evidently cant grasp my view point... Marry who u want but if pashtun/pashtuna wanna marry out then there is nothing wrong with it... to say something is wrong is to say its immoral and I take offence at that,....

[Master Khan]

I never agreed that it's racism. If you read my posts here, I said that I myself would not marry a non-Pukhtun, and I gave my reasons.

If someone believes that I'm being racist for not willing to marry a non-Pukhtun, that's not for me to deal with; that's their opinion, that's their idea of racism, and I disagree with it strongly. Why should I let it bother me? It won't change my own decision.

Khor if you read my posts then you would know that I am not being racist.

[Dreamer]

^ sure ur not... its perfectly normal 2 say that true pashtuns dnt let their female members marry out as if its some sin...

[Roshina]

Someone is openly abusing members here by using words as BARKING and RETARD and nobody is taking action. Really surprising to me!

Gulalai Jaaney, that's not true. I have edited several posts of the person you're referring to, and I have deleted the terms like "barking," "retard," etc. Please refer to the person's posts to check for yourself. Guley (another moderator) and I have deleted some posts as well, if they were short and used only abusive language. We've also contacted those whose language is not appreciated during discussion.

We're honestly doing the best we can, and I'm not sure if we can assure you of this fully. It's five of us, and our times are very different. Therefore, please don't expect immediate action when you find something offensive; we do it as soon as we can.

Thank you for your patience and cooperation, guley!

[erlangner]

was I preaching???? i said its ok for pashtuns 2 marry out I wasnt telling ppl 2 go ahead... then two neolithical mind set members came on here ranting and raving that they wanted 2 preserve their race... Like I was forcing ppl 2 marry out.... Thats why i keep saying read my posts.... a thread like this was bound to cause arguments

Brother Dreamer, I read all the posts, see things are not as you think. You should also see the realities of Pashtun culture and Pashtun nature. You may be an ultramodern Pashtun, I dont care for it,but to blame Pashtun nationalism and Pashtuns as a nation by saying backward, living in stone age etc is not fair. Yes we are much backward comparing ourselves to other nations, but it is not because of restricting these marriages. There are 100 of other reasons. Yes Pashtuns resist changes by nature. So there is need for gradual and acceptable changes in pashtun society, not to change them abruptly, It brings desaster. Dear Brother, we should connect our yesterday with today and then today with tomorrow, if we will jump from yesterday to tomorrow, we will break our legs and will lye in the yesterday for years more.
Another thing to be proud of Pashoon nationalism, is the socially accepted throughout the world. It is called ethnocentrism in sociology and it is natural.
Therefore to call someone racist on this base, then worse than holocaust will happen.

[Dreamer]

Gulalai Jaaney, that's not true. I have edited several posts of the person you're referring to, and I have deleted the terms like "barking," "retard," etc. Please refer to the person's posts to check for yourself.

We're honestly doing the best we can, and I'm not sure if we can assure you of this fully. It's four of us, and our times are very different. Therefore, please don't expect immediate action when you find something offensive; we do it as soon as we can.

Thank you for your patience and cooperation, guley!

how do I report a member?

[Dreamer]

Brother Dreamer, I read all the posts, see things are not as you think. You should also see the realities of Pashtun culture and Pashtun nature. You may be an ultramodern Pashtun, I dont care for it,but to blame Pashtun nationalism and Pashtuns as a nation by saying backward, living in stone age etc is not fair. Yes we are much backward comparing ourselves to other nations, but it is not because of restricting these marriages. There are 100 of other reasons. Yes Pashtuns resist changes by nature. So there is need for gradual and acceptable changes in pashtun society, not to change them abruptly, It brings desaster. Dear Brother, we should connect our yesterday with today and then today with tomorrow, if we will jump from yesterday to tomorrow, we will break our legs and will lye in the yesterday for years more.
Another thing to be proud of Pashoon nationalism, is the socially accepted throughout the world. It is called ethnocentrism in sociology and it is natural.
Therefore to call someone racist on this base, then worse than holocaust will happen.

i said the view that saying its wring to marry out is frm the stine ages not pashtuns.... The holocaust happened because one ppl thought they were superior to another
lol at ultra modern...
the reason I take such great offence at this view is because wrong = immoral=sin.... who are they God? No... dont make haraam what is halal

[Master Khan]

^ sure ur not... its perfectly normal 2 say that true pashtuns dnt let their female members marry out as if its some sin...

yeah because they follow something call Pakhtunwali.