~ Your friends or your enemies?

[Mayana]

Salamalaikum,

I came across this wonderful Hadith:

“The example of a good companion and that of a bad one is like the one who [sells] musk and [an iron smith]. The one who sells the musk will either give you some or you will at least get some of his good smell on you. As for the [iron smith], he will either burn your clothes or you will get some of his stench.” (Bukhari)

And it reminded me of another saying:

If someones state does not lift you up, and his words do not lead you to Allah, Then do not keep his company. -Ibn Ata'illah Iskandari

Life introduces us to many different types of people. They my enlighten us and guide us or they might make us angry and frustrated through their behavior, attitude, words or ideas. We might find us like this: or like this: lol And while it is very important to be patient, forgiving and understanding with our friends and companions, we have to be able to take a step back at any given point in time and analyze our relationship with them: Does this person have a positive or a negative influence on me? Am I benefiting from this person's company or am I suffering from it? How have I changed around him//her and why? Is the change worth it? How has my behavior changed around others because of this person? How has my attitude toward life changed because of this person?



And while it holds truth that we are here to support one another and help each other, one must also consider if a certain friendship/companionship is harmful or if it even causes one to put one's own life on hold or even go backwards.

We have goals and ambitions in this life, let's not forget them. Friends are a blessing and are wonderful but let's not put ourselves in situations that lead us to do things we will regret one day. Make a decision. Find out who you want to be in 10 years, in 20 years. Then chose a small circle of friends with the same goals and the same principles as you. Let peer pressure do positive work. Avoid people who bring out the worst in you, avoid those who do not share the same goals as you, avoid those that turn you into who you never wanted to be.

People with ugly traits and behavior you can't stand will aggravate and irritate you and in the process turn you into one of them.. because your reactions to their behavior take their colors: If they are angry people, you will react angrily. If they are backbiting people, you will react with backbiting.

Be smart and be assertive in every aspect of life, especially when it comes to whom you chose as a companion, as the saying in Dari goes..

Ba Maah nishi, Maah shawi,
Ba Deg nishi, seyaa shawi.


If you sit with the moon, you become like the moon,
If you sit with the pot, you become black.




This is a mere reminder to myself before anyone else.



- Mayana

[Zayam]

This is so strange Mayana-I also very recently read those verses and now I can not remember where I read them, so odd to see this post, like deja vu.

[Mayana]

This is so strange Mayana-I also very recently read those verses and now I can not remember where I read them, so odd to see this post, like deja vu.

Yup, coincidences define my life.