Do you like "mardana" females?

[MeemWawMeemNoon]

When the Holy Prophet (saw) was called to the duty of prophethood, Hadhrat Khadijah (ra) decided to give all of her wealth to him. He warned her that he will take everything and disperse it among the needy. He warned her that he would free everyone. He warned her that he would do with her wealth as he pleased. She agreed to all. When he (saw) asked her why she was willing to do this, she said that as the Prophet of Allah (saw) she does not want him to ask anything from her when he will need it. She said: Let all my wealth be yours--I want to preserve your dignity.

A woman who fights for power control with her husband has ruined her home.

[MeemWawMeemNoon]

A man should not boss around his wife needlessly and vice versa. However, there is the role of a man and a woman, and Islam has made the man, as per his dominant nature, to be the chief of the house.

That said, a good leader will be humble with his appointment and not take advantage. He would make himself a bridge for the benefit of his family. As such, a woman has a role to fulfill. Not both can be leaders; there is mutual consultation, but there is only ONE veto, and that is given to the husband, even if his brain is the size of a raisin.

[Michin Khel]

OMG! A teacher of mine mentioned "Begum Nawazish" in a class yesterday, and I had NEVER heard of her! So I looked her up, and omg omg omg... she's SO DAMN COOL!!! It's actually a man (named Ali Saleem) who hosts this talk show in Pakistan and dresses, acts, talks, and looks like a woman.

You find confused begam nawazish ali DAMN COOL?

I think he+she is not even sure whether he has testicles or ovaries?

[MeemWawMeemNoon]

Get to know her, she will find any means to promote her beliefs. Even, if it means to go against the Quran.

Think about it.

She is against docile women. As if, docile women are all the product of a male dominated society. That is how pathetic her thinking is. The rest you can fill in the blanks.

[IamDZJ]

You find confused begam nawazish ali DAMN COOL?

I think he+she is not even sure whether he has testicles or ovaries?

have you heard him speak? you can put 10 women in one side of the room and then 10 men in the other side and you will still not come up with a personality like his.
he has what it takes to get away with whatever he does.

[Shayesta]

'Mardana' as in? Independent or?

[Catya Sher]

Be careful, Unknown, there are a number of said type women right here on the very site.
Wouldn't you shudder to marry any of them?!
Notice their strident tones of writing?
So what would they SPEAK like in person?
Life would be living Hell from DAY ONE !
My advice: don't even JOKE about such an idea.
Because Allah could send one because you asked for that.
Everything we speak has reverberations.

The problem with a bossy woman, too, is that she would badger YOU about the financial situation, rather than be willing to shoulder any burden in that regard !

The best to pray for is a wife with a SWEET personality.
That's not a word I have seen mentioned once on this site so far.

Bossy women are usually IRRELIGIOUS, too, another problem.

Bossy wives are a fixture in Chinese-American society, I hear.
Because that group is so OVER-intent on what ?
Materialism, building up goods in THIS world, and often flaunting them.
Also they are keen on education as the means to obtain such goods.
Some are vaguely interested in Confucianism. Some in Chinese Buddhist ideas, but
those take a back seat to getting ahead MATERIALLY in America and establishing oneself.
Bossy Chinese wives are integral to this process.

So...based on Asian-Americans I've seen in the West of America, I wouldn't recommend taking that route . Unless one covets the newest Lexus SUV as his glittering goal for this life and places little importance on the next, higher, life !

[Catya Sher]

There is a hidden problem with "bossy women".
That is ANGER.
If you look at average American women around you, if you live in North America, look at their faces.
Listen to the voices. Hear how they snap at their children in public CONSTANTLY.
American fathers do this too.
They are always yelling.
There is not the love shown toward children that one sees in a Muslim country.

My argument is that the bossy, overbearing woman is hiding VOLUMES of ANGER which will inevitably erupt on You, the prospective husband. And on all children.

Notice how cross the expressions are, how short the attention span and patience are of a typical American woman.
Whether "successful" or not. The women corporate executives are the worst of all, from my observation.
Many of my friends who were fun in college transformed into demanding, snappy type professionals.

So I just thought I would pass this warning on that it's not valuable to copy this style.

Why is it that no one here has a sweet-sounding personality - just judging from how the women write?

Are they consciously or subconsicously imitating the style, way of speaking, mannerisms of the American business woman or professional?
I wouldn't recommend it myself.

For a sweet personality is the best to cultivate. Not all these layers of synthetic ways which are not one's own but become one's own when no discrimination is employed in deciding what type of woman to be. Or, what type of woman a man is searching for.

The more specific idea of that latter a man has, the more he will find that type. Especially when he asks for Allah to select the right woman, not a mother or parents or peer pressure or any exterior force.

[IamDZJ]

^ what is it with you and "typical american women"? what do you have against them? you do realize that your commitment to presenting your self as an extraordinary woman of the west doesn't necessarily require you to constantly put the rest of them down?
there are rules in every society. people choose to follow or defy them for certain reasons. you can't pick and choose and then point at others to ha ha them. perhaps you were an outcast in your own society.

[Dreamer]

Actually my question is do you like autoritative and bossy women?

Personally za khazay/jinai wale nakhray kho pasand kawa kho mutabri ye na.

a related question,
Do you attract towards feminists (those of west are prone to become lesbian)?

what a stupid statement that feminists are likely to become lesbians esp those of the west.... just goes 2 show that chauvanistic attitudes are still anrd... how sad

[Catya Sher]

DZJ -

Actually rather than an outcast, I was invited to be a debutante at that age, and happily went through with the ceremony. I'm not a rebel against society like one friend who opted out thinking the whole thing was too exclusive and maybe elitist or snobbish.

Here is not the place to talk about me.

But I am interested to discuss with you or anyone interested about the subject of Eastern versus Western women.

My attitudes are based on travel around the world which opened my eyes to so many other - and usually better ! - ways of life than the American one. The more I saw, the more strange Americans in general seemed ! My formative experiences, one might say, were amongst the Pashtuns in Pashtunkhwa. I feel like I got the education there which was what I had needed. All my fancy schools did not equip me with almost a single thing of value. It was just book learning, which I never have even used again.

The lessons I learned in Peshawar - & the region - have been invaluable for my entire life.

So I try to encourage you to stay your real selves, as it's the right thing.
I'm glad YOU are not ashamed.
I would like to hear more about your feelings about this topic.

But, I fear others ARE. They shouldn't be. Plus they shouldn't feel under some sort of Western pressure to prove that they are not these obscurantist Pashtuns/Afghans that the American propaganda mill has built the image of in the last 12 or more years.

[akbarkhan]

Mardana females like Maiwandi Malalai? They are rare gems, if I ever came across one I will keep it for life!

[abubaker]

Mardana females like Maiwandi Malalai? They are rare gems, if I ever came across one I will keep it for life!

good luck with that

[Shehbaz Khan]

Do you like 'mardana' females?

Man are you kidding me when it's mardana its not females stuff !! :D
Oh so you talking about the ones having a voice like a tractor and hands like big show !! I certainly don't like :p

Yeah But I love bold females the ones with the courage .. And you gotta admit they are there to beat the males.. But they must always have the feminine touch like 'Nazakat' :p And this 'nazakat' could never be artificial !! The poet says;

Nazaakat nazneeno kay bananay say nahe banti,
Khuda jab husn deta hay nazakat aa he jati hay .. !!

[kandahari ella]

I hate double standards. Especially when it comes to the voices of the genders. I'm a feminist and like other mentioned NO I'm not a lesbian. I'm for women's rights. I'll stop there before I go on a tangent. I couldn't stand to be with a man that's overpowering or at the same time being passive. Not because, I'm putting random societal standards upon him, but because I need him to be rational and pick and choose from those characteristics. The same goes for me, I cannot sit there and be quiet just because a man is going to think I'm being "annoying" or "aggressive". I will voice my opinion if the truth is not being said, I'll never just turn and close my eyes to that. So if that makes me a "witch" then let that be. I'm a sweetheart, but there's a line you can't cross. Period. And once that's crossed I'm not going to sit there all googly eyed at you. I'll speak my mind. Honestly, its tough being a woman. There's so much always going on.

I believe someone mentioned that women in the US are more angry. Think about it like this: You wake up at the butt crack of dawn, to get you and your kids ready for the day, you go work for 8 hours straight, come home, help your children with their homework, make dinner and do other chores around the house. You literally come home, from one work shift to start another one. And you pass out at what around 11pm. Only to wake up at 6am again. The model that I just presented is of a modern traditional family. Where there is both a mother and father in the household. So think about it, if you had to do all of that, could you still have the happiest smile on your face and be the sweetest person in the world? That's reality. And I'm not saying that women in other societies don't have as much going on, but boy do they ever. But there you're taught as a woman, that that's your role and you cannot do anything about it. And here you're not. And you don't have to smile through it all because its hard as hell doing all that you have to do. Sorry, I probably went of tangent again.

In the end, I don't think its alright to accept that men can be "annoying", "aggressive" "dominant" and "angry" while women have to absorb all of those emotions someplace else or throw them away altogether.