How Would You Act?

[Shayesta]

Imagine there is a girl/guy you liked, but you can't marry that person because she/he is already in a relationship. Would it be hard for you to get over that person, or will you think of just moving on? The reason why I am asking this question is because our Pukhtoon men got this image of being a 'real man', whose heart never can be broken and definitely not for a girl because that's what they been told by men in their family. But does a 'broken dream' really have hard effect on you guys? Or do you easily get over it?

How would you in fact act around that person, knowing that NOW you can't have her/him?

[Feroza_Banu]

for me there won't be any question of liking anyone who falls into these three catagories...

1. married, engaged, gf, relationship
2. non muslim
3. non afghan.

so this wouldn't apply to me... these three things are like evil cross across a person, like someone has written "Do not enter" or "Dead End Ahead"

[Master Khan]

I would just move on because I don't want to create any problems with her and her family...but it will be hard.

[شمله ور خراساني]

I would do what any self-respecting bollywood fan would do. Climb up a tree, start singing songs and carve her name on my arm untill somebody mistakes me for an escaped baboon and shoots me.

[Master Khan]

I wanna know what kind of relationship?

[Muslimah]

definitely need more clarity.
Men act all macho - but they do have hearts!

[Iqra]

Your first sentence gives away the answer. They are already in a relationship...so as peroza said ..that's a no no.

Even if they are not in a relationship and they are not trying to make it work, then I'd still say move on.

We might think we can't live w/out them or whatever other stuff our creative minds can tell us...but honestly ..there's many great people out there inshaAllah ... so yeah

[BLS_1919v2.0]

I would do what any self-respecting bollywood fan would do. Climb up a tree, start singing songs and carve her name on my arm untill somebody mistakes me for an escaped baboon and shoots me.

hahahahha yaraa sangar I am going to send you an honorary high 5 for that one.

[Shayesta]

More clarity please.

I need more information to give an indepth answer.

More information/clarity as in what?

I wanna know what kind of relationship?

Just for argument's sake: Married.

Your first sentence gives away the answer. They are already in a relationship...so as peroza said ..that's a no no.

That's the thing khorey, even though when you will think you should just stay away, some people don't do it! I know of a guy who was talking to this girl every now and then and there wasn't any sign of him liking her, he used to keep his head low and talk as if he feels nothing for her. But apparently when he found out she got married, he completely got quiet, acted strangely around her, tried to avoid her but at same time was out on excuses to just talk to her. And they knew each other for just few weeks, yet his behaviour has completely changed and it has become clear it's really hard for him to get over it. And I thought love DOES require time...........

[Pakhtunzai]

I would do what any self-respecting bollywood fan would do. Climb up a tree, start singing songs and carve her name on my arm untill somebody mistakes me for an escaped baboon and shoots me.

Sangaara I cracked up sooo loudly at this!..You smash it bro! manana

[Zahed]

I would do what any self-respecting bollywood fan would do. Climb up a tree, start singing songs and carve her name on my arm untill somebody mistakes me for an escaped baboon and shoots me.

hahahahahahahahahaha!

[Muslimah]

Allah swt picks who you will marry - you cant change fate. If she got married and he never spoke up - he wasn't meant to speak up and be with her. To break a marriage - or interefere with one - I wouldn't want to deal with all that sin! Just take it as a sign from Allah.
Allah gives you 3 answers, none of them being "no", they are:
1) Yes
2) Yes, but not now
3) I have something better planned for you

So...take #3 and apply it.

[MeemWawMeemNoon]

To break a marriage - or interefere with one - I wouldn't want to deal with all that sin!

Masha Allah!

[Shayesta]

the best thing would be for that person to find someone else. It will never work out and that person might become a house-wrecker.

The guy hardly communicates with anyone, she was pretty much the only one. Though I never had a broken heart regarding loving a guy or anything, but my heart completely broke when I got disappointed in some friends and even family members. Our situation might be different but we both got, as it is, a broken heart and I can tell it's not a good feeling at all to have a broken heart. So I can realise what he must be going through.

If she got married and he never spoke up - he wasn't meant to speak up and be with her. To break a marriage - or interefere with one - I wouldn't want to deal with all that sin!

He only knew her for few months only and maybe thought it would be too early to confess, and nor he knew she was in a relationship. But I did saw how happy he used to be before, and how disappointing his face is now. He doesn't interfere really but the girl feels really bad and guilty and doesn't know whether she should talk to him or not? It surely doesn't make any difference for the girl any more as she already is married, but maybe the guy can express what he is feeling like and maybe feel a little bit better?

[Millatpal Noorzai]

I rather not get that attached to someone whose thoughts might become a headache for me later =/
I am all for arranged marriages.